


The Sun that Shines at Night

by notaguitarfret



Series: "They're all girlfriends" AU [9]
Category: Heathers (1988), Heathers: The Musical - Murphy & O'Keefe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Internalized Homophobia, someone please help these gay messes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-28
Updated: 2018-08-28
Packaged: 2019-07-03 22:43:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15828435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notaguitarfret/pseuds/notaguitarfret
Summary: Heather McNamara and Veronica have a long talk about their worries.





	The Sun that Shines at Night

Ah, The Princess Bride, of course.

A common contestant for Martha’s movie nights. Veronica didn’t necessarily mind - Martha always got super giddy whenever she watched the film. It was her favourite, after all.

“How many times has she watched this?” JD asked from next to her. Veronica shrugged.

“I’ve lost count.” She sighed. “Surprised she hasn’t memorised it by now.”

“Don’t tempt her,” Betty said, making Veronica turn to her right. “I feel like she could if she tried.”

“Well, it’s JD’s first movie night!” Martha exclaimed. “I wanted to start out with something iconic!”

Veronica gave a light huff. “You’re right. This _is_ a movie night tradition.”

JD then leaned forward to whisper in Veronica’s ear,

“I’ve already seen it.”

Veronica turned back to him.

“Me too. Many, many times.”

She then took a big gulp of her lemon slushie, the freezing ice shooting right up to her head. Perhaps she would’ve complained, but right now she was living for the frozen rush.

She waited for the pain to numb, before taking yet another gulp. But as she sucked, she was only met with air.

“Shit,” she muttered, glancing at her empty cup.

“That was quick,” JD commented, nodding to the cup. “I’m surprised you haven’t turned into an ice queen yet.”

“God, I _wish_ ,” she muttered, slamming the cup down on the coffee table, before tucking herself further into the blanket she shared with JD.

“Care for a hit, then?” JD asked, offering his blue raspberry slushie. Veronica stared at it for a moment, before snatching it out of his hands and taking a mouthful. She let out a rough sigh as the freeze hit.

“God, are you okay, Veronica?” Betty asked, having spotted the grimace that had formed on her lips. Veronica handed JD his slushie back, before shooting Betty a side glance, tucking her knees under her chin.

“I won’t bring the mood down,” she grumbled, staring blankly at the screen. She could see Betty and Martha frown at her.

“Hey, if anything’s bothering you, you can tell us!” Martha said, offering a supportive smile.

“Yeah, we can just pause the movie while you vent.”

Veronica gazed sadly at them both. This was supposed to be a fun night. It had been a couple of weeks since she’d been able to hang out with Martha and Betty _properly_ , and the first time she was able to hang it when them as well as JD as a group. She didn’t want to bring them down with the shitshow that had been her week.

Specifically yesterday.

There was also the fact that even if she wanted to… she couldn’t. She just couldn’t. It was one of _those_ situations again, one of those situations where she’d found herself stuck in a ditch and feeling as though asking for a little help out of it would cause more harm than good. Probably. It depends who you call on to help you, if she were being honest.

Either way, she couldn’t. Not the first time she had something on her chest that wasn’t allowed to come off. Perhaps she should get used to it.

“You alright?” Betty asked, breaking Veronica out of her thoughts. She lifted her head off of her knees and sighed.

“Look, I _really_ want to tell you, but…” She shook her head. “I can’t.”

Betty and Martha frowned. JD simply listened intently.

“This doesn’t have anything to do with…” Betty gritted her teeth. “ _You know who._ ”

Oh, Veronica knew who.

“...Sort of,” she replied bluntly. Both Betty and Martha grew more attentive at that.

Beside her, JD tilted his head.

“So, I only vaguely know what’s going on between you and Heather,” he said. “I might need a more in-depth explanation.”

 _Don’t worry, you’re not the only one._ She bit back the urge of saying that.

“I dunno. I have a crush on her. What more do you need?” She shrugged, while doing her best to hide the fact that that was a blatant _lie_.

Well, it wasn’t. She did have a crush on Heather Chandler. She’d known that for almost a month.

It’s just that she missed out the parts where they kissed, they made out, then fucked three (and a half?) times over a weekend. All of it being _casual_ of course. Tortuously _casual_.

But she couldn’t mention that part, of course.

“What’s happened?” Martha asked, shuffling along the couch and leaning over Betty.

“Did she get…” Betty gasped and put her hands over her mouth. “A _boyfriend_?” Her tone made her sound horrified.

Veronica winced.

“I guess.”

“ _NO!_ ” Betty wailed. “The betrayal…”

_Oh, you could say that again._

Veronica was quick to hold her hands out in front of her, gesturing Betty to calm down.

“I mean, when I say _I guess_ it’s more of a _she went on a date_.” Her nose then scrunched up. “But I wouldn’t… worry about it. Not really.”

“How come?” Martha asked.

“Because ‘dates’ for Heather Chandler is really a codeword for ‘hookup.’” She flicked her hand back and forth dismissively. “If she were to actually find a boyfriend who dated her for more than a week, I’d be _stunned_.”

The two girls let out a sigh of relief, Betty especially.

“There’s still hope!” she exclaimed.

Veronica frowned. She wasn’t sure if she could agree or not. She just didn’t know.

_I just don’t know._

“But still, are you okay?” Betty then asked, placing a hand on her shoulder. “That must’ve been really upsetting to hear.”

Veronica shrugged, frowning. “I guess.”

“Group hug!”

Veronica was suddenly tackled by her three friends, their tight embraces almost suffocating her. Regardless, she appreciated the gesture.

“Ha… thanks… guys…” she managed to choke out. Then the hug was over.

“It’s okay!” Betty said. “It’s really gotten you down, huh.”

Veronica gave a look of uncertainty, before her eyes trailed to the empty cup she’d left on the coffee table.

“Well, yeah,” she mumbled. “But it’s… it’s not the only thing on my mind right now.”

“Oh?” Betty raised her brows. “What is it?”

Veronica bit her lip as she tried to think. She knew exactly what was on her mind right now. It hadn’t gone away since… well, yesterday. A fresh event, if you will.

Now, if only she knew how to put it…

 

* * *

 

It was the end of the week. Finally, Friday had come after a very… shit week. The aftermath of a failed Remington party had shaken the Heathers up pretty hard, especially on Monday, in which they all ended up ditching half the day. It was that bad.

It had calmed with each day gone by, though. Thank God. Still some tension between the Heathers and Courtney, though. Detention was by no means fun on Tuesday. Just Veronica, Heather Chandler and Courtney in a room together. Brown and blue both staring down… whatever colour Courtney’s eyes were. She wasn’t sure, nor did she care.

Something did strike her as odd, though. It was present all week, but the detention spent with Heather Chandler really stood out to her.

The entire time they were there, Veronica had attempted to crack a few jokes about the whole situation, in hopes of lightening up the mood with an added bonus of hearing Heather Chandler laugh. A sound that was always welcome in her book.

_“Kinda satisfying that she has a week of this to look forward to, huh?”_

Heather had said nothing. Veronica wasn’t even sure if she’d heard her.

So she tried again some time later.

_“I wonder how many bruises she had to bandage up.”_

That time Heather did react, but not in the way she was looking for. She had just twisted her body away from her and shielded her forehead with her hand.

Veronica took that as a sign that she should probably remain quiet for the rest of the detention.

Now, Heather _had_ spoken to her during the week, but it wasn’t very… constant. That is, in comparison to last week. Or the week before. Or the week before that.

But perhaps she was just overthinking things.

She had shook off the thought while sharing a conversation with JD, just next to her locker.

“Remington party, huh?” JD said, leaning against the wall of lockers. “How’d that go?”

Veronica let out an exasperated sigh. “About as well as you could imagine.” She shoved a folder into her locker as she said that.

“You’re too innocent to be going to those parties,” JD stated. “I hear that each time you enter them, some of your soul gets devoured, only to be replaced by a plastic substitute.”

Veronica snickered as she rolled her eyes. “And suddenly I understand the Heathers.”

Speaking of which.

“ _Veronicaaaaaaa-!”_

She winced at the fierce sound of Heather Chandler’s voice, coming from behind her. She turned away from JD and shut her locker, and saw Chandler and Duke stalking over to them both.

“Yeah?”

Chandler stopped just a few feet away from her, Duke close behind. The sight was odd; the lineup was incomplete.

“If you’re finished with your _boy toy_.” Those last two words came out as a hiss through gritted teeth. Veronica winced, before looked back to JD.

“Uh… see you tomorrow, I guess?”

JD nodded. “Yeah. See ya.”

Without another word, he turned around and walked away, his trenchcoat trailing behind him like a cape.

She then slowly turned back around to face the two Heathers.

“What did you need?” she asked.

“Have you seen Mac?” Chandler asked as soon as their eyes locked. Veronica blinked at her.

“No? Why?” She glanced at them both in confusion. “Isn’t she usually with you?”

Duke gave a shrug. “Well, clearly she isn’t.”

Veronica furrowed her brow. “Have _either_ of you seen her today?” She leaned against the lockers. “She might just be ill or something.”

“No, she’s in,” Chandler muttered. “I gave her a ride here, and she was in math, which was last period.”

Veronica arched a brow. “If she was in your class last period, how’d you lose sight of her?”

Chandler rolled her eyes. “Because she _left_.” She then began to walk down the corridor, giving Veronica and Duke no choice but to follow on.

“Left? What do you mean?” Veronica asked, catching up with her to walk beside her. Chandler kept her head facing forward as she spoke.

“She got called out in the middle of class for some reason, and she was gone for about ten minutes or so.” She peered around the corner, eyes darting around for any signs of a girl dressed in yellow. “I just assumed she got a call from home or something. I dunno, I never found out.”

“Didn’t you ask?”

Chandler groaned. “ _No_ , because when she came back she grabbed her shit and left.” Their usual restroom suddenly came in sight, and she gestured them both towards it. “She didn’t say another word.”

“Huh,” Veronica huffed curiously. “Odd.”

“My point exactly.” She swung the door open, and as soon as she did, the couple of girls who were already in there widened their eyes at the three girls’ presence, and the icy glare of Chandler was able to strike enough fear in them for them to flee. Veronica frowned as they nervously slipped past them, careful to not accidentally bump into any of them on their way out.

Dammit. She has never and _will_ never enjoy being a piranha.

“Well, she’s not in here,” Duke muttered, crossing her arms. Chandler held up a finger in front of her - a way to tell her to stay quiet for a moment. A nicer gesture than her usual method.

“What about…” She turned towards the only closed stall and narrowed her eyes. She then stalked over to it, her heels clicking the tiled floor in a threatening manner. “Whoever’s in there, open up.”

Duke and Veronica just cast a side glance at each other, uncertain that this plan was going to work.

The door didn’t move for a moment, and no sound came to the stall. Then a click, and it became ajar.

Duke and Veronica weren’t close enough to see what made Chandler take a step back with a look of disgust on her face, that is until,

“Fucking hell, _get out of the girl’s bathroom!_ ”

Out of the stall came two sophomores - one female, the other male. They both looked absolutely terrified having been caught… probably fucking. Or at least making out. They scampered out of the bathroom, both of them keeping their heads down as they did so.

“Ugh,” Chandler groaned. Veronica gave a snicker.

“You probably just interrupted their first,” she said. Chandler sneered at the exit that had just swung shut.

“Boo-fucking-hoo.” Then she marched towards that very same exit. “She’s not here. Let’s keep looking.”

Chandler then lead them to the bathroom on the other end of the school - one they never really went to due to it being so unkempt. When entering, they found nothing. Chandler let out a frustrated grunt.

“Did she evaporate into thin air?” she growled, turning around to begin marching down the hallways again.

“Does she have detention?” Veronica guessed. “Or cheerleading practice?”

“No, dumbass, she’s not on the cheerleading time right now, remember?” Chandler muttered.

“Oh, right.”

“Where to now, Heather?” Duke asked.

“Hm. I feel like I know where she might’ve gone,” Chandler replied, turning a corner that lead to a more crowded hallway. “If she skipped math, that is.”

Veronica was curious to where she was leading her, but soon got her answer when she found herself on the hallway of the gym. She followed Heather past those double doors, heading further up towards the girl’s changing rooms.

They walked through the currently empty room that was generally used by the cheerleading team, then lead into the bathroom connected to it. There, Heather paused.

“Mac?”

Veronica sauntered around her in order to take a look at the restroom. It appeared empty, though there was one locked stall at the end of the row.

“Mac,” Chandler repeated, making her way towards the locked stall. No response came.

Chandler paused just in front of the door.

“Whoever’s in there, open up.”

 _Sounds like a bad idea, considering the last time you said that,_ Veronica thought.

“Open the door, or I’ll kick it open.”

“No, no, don’t do that!” The tense air lingering around them suddenly evaporated when they heard McNamara’s voice. “I’ll open it now…”

The door timidly clicked open, and Chandler took a step backwards to let the blonde escape the stall.

“Where have you been?” Duke asked, walking over to her. Veronica did the same.

“You left math without another word. What happened?” Chandler asked, folding her arms. Her expression had melted into one more concerned than frustrated, though.

Veronica couldn’t see McNamara’s expression from where she stood. She was gazing at her from an angle where her blonde bangs hung over the side of her face like a blanket.

“I skipped math,” she said quietly, looking at the ground. Veronica took note that she was gripping onto her wrists, her shoulders tense and her body swaying back and forth. It was normal for her, though for some reason, Veronica couldn’t help but be put off by the action. It seemed so… stiff.

“Okay? So why are you still here?” Chandler asked.

There was a pause.

“I’m skipping lunch?”

Duke shot her an odd look. “M, you can’t skip lunch. It’s lunch.”

A horribly cruel irony that it was Duke who said that. Obviously she wasn’t referring to the meal, but still.

“Yeah, um…” McNamara seemed to lose her words, and Veronica couldn’t help but shoot her a look of concern.

“You okay, Heather?” She took a step forward and offered a hand on her shoulder. “You seem…”

Her words trailed off when Heather lifted her head to look at her. While only one eye could be seen, Veronica didn’t need to push her bangs out of her face to notice the red tint on the rim of her eyes.

“Heather?” Her eyes widened a little. With how her mascara was ever so slightly smudged, Veronica could only assume that she’d been crying. “Hey, are you-”

She tried to place two hands on her shoulders to offer some form of comfort, but McNamara silenced her by placing her finger on her lips.

“I want an absence note,” she said, her voice clear of any emotion. Veronica held her gaze for a moment.

“Uh… okay,” she stuttered, reaching into her bag to grab her diary, where she also kept spare absence notes.

“You’re ditching?” Duke asked, eyeing her curiously.

“I don’t feel well.”

Veronica arched a brow at her. “Then why do you need me to forge-”

“Just do it,” McNamara interrupted. “Please.”

“You seem tense,” Chandler spoke as Veronica began to scribble down a forgery. “Anything you want to tell us?”

McNamara was silent for a moment.

“I’m fine,” she murmured. “Just…” She held out her hand, waiting to grab the slip from Veronica. Once finished, Veronica hesitantly handed the slip to her, though once she had it, she, for some reason, felt oddly guilty. Especially when Heather tightened a hold on the strap of her handbag.

“See you Monday,” she muttered, beginning to make her way to the door. “And… uh… have a nice time on your date tonight, Heather.” She cast a glance back to Chandler, who raised her brows at that.

“Oh, thanks.”

McNamara gave one last smile, one that seemed terribly forced, before she left without another word. The three of them were left standing in the restroom, confused.

And for Veronica, another emotion was to be added to the confusing pile already building up.

“Date?” she echoed, glancing at Chandler, who didn’t bother looking at her.

“Yeah.”

Veronica swallowed down the pit of envy making her way up her throat, threatening to form words for her.

“Oh. Have fun with that,” she forced out.

Chandler began to walk towards the door, not even casting her another glance.

“Thanks.”

 

* * *

 

“She was acting weird, right?” Veronica muttered to Duke.

“Yeah,” Duke said, not looking up from her book.

Veronica glanced at the table. It was strangely empty without McNamara, and horribly imbalanced. She’d taken a seat next to Duke, away from Chandler out of spite who seemed awfully caught up with a conversation with a preppy male.

Her fingers curled around on her thigh, her nails scratching at her skin every time she heard her giggle. Not because of her. She was giggling because of something some dumb kid said.

“Is that her date, by any chance?” she questioned, trying to make her tone sound as casual as she could. Duke glanced up from her book to look at the two conversing at the end of the table.

“Probably.” She then turned around and leaned into Veronica’s ear. “Date is her codeword for hookup, though. Don’t bother making friends with him.”

_Wouldn’t fucking dream of it._

Veronica stabbed at her meal, her frustrated actions fueled by two things: jealousy that Chandler was probably going to get dicked tonight and anxiety about why McNamara had seemed so upset.

“Stop trying to kill your curry,” Duke grunted. “It’s already dead.”

“Sorry,” she muttered, the grip on her fork calming. “I’m just… uh…”

“Worried for Mac?”

_Well, she’s not wrong._

“Yeah.”

“Have you ever seen her upset before?” Duke asked, dropping her book on the table. Veronica looked thoughtful for a moment.

“I mean… never like that?”

“Ah. Explains it,” she replied. “Then you won’t know how she gets.”

Veronica gave her a puzzled look.

“What do you mean?”

Duke opened her mouth to reply, but was interrupted by Chandler sliding down the bench parallel to them.

“What you talking about?” she asked, leaning forward with interest.

Veronica reluctantly caught her eye.

“Heather,” Duke replied. Chandler gave a sigh.

“It’s been a while since I’ve seen her like that,” she confessed, taking a sip of her water. Veronica gave her an odd look.

“Like _what_?”

Chandler dropped the glass back on her tray and gave a grunt.

“Sometimes she’ll get upset about something and then just…” She shrugged. “Close off from everyone.”

Veronica paused.

“...Why?”

Chandler blinked at her.

“She just _does_ ,” she said sternly. “It’ll be fine. She usually comes back and acts like nothing happened.”

Veronica shot both of them a look.

“Don’t you check on her?”

“ _Yes_ ,” Duke snapped. “She just doesn’t talk that much.”

“She either overshares or undershares,” Chandler added. “There’s no in between.” She looked down at her plate. “I’m not bothered by it, really, but it’s a struggle to get a word out of her.”

Veronica stared at her blankly. She wanted to ask more questions - ask what could’ve gotten McNamara in such a state, ask how she could get her to open up, perhaps, because the sad glisten in her eye had felt like a kick in the face.

But the conversation took a turn to a place where she really didn’t want to be.

“So, what you planning for your date tonight, Heather?” Duke asked, closing her book. Chandler gave a hum.

“Not sure. Might go out for dinner. Might go to his place-”

Aaaaand that was Veronica’s view to tune out. Whatever was said after that point, she didn’t care. She didn’t hear.

Instead, she occupied her senses with the many other conversations happening around her that suddenly became interesting. And while her ears were busy with that, her mind started to think about McNamara. What on earth could’ve gotten her down so much?

Well, maybe quite a few things. McNamara was the most sensitive out of the three, as well as the most emotional. So long as she just ignores the fact that she’s seen Heather Chandler cry but not Heather McNamara.

 _Then again, does seeing her post-cry count?_ she thought, frowning. _It was a sad sight either way._

She let out a sigh. Out of all the Heathers, McNamara had been the only one who treated her like a friend from the start. Sure, the other two warmed up to her and perhaps one of them a little too much but McNamara was… nice. As nice as Heathers go. So now, sitting here without a bright colour in sight, Veronica couldn’t help but feel like there was a rain cloud hanging over her head. No sun. Just rain.

“Wow, Heather, so romantic,” Duke said dryly. Veronica glanced at Chandler, who rolled her eyes and scoffed.

“I’m not here for _romance_ , I’m here for a good time.”

Duke gave a snort of amusement, while Veronica just snapped her gaze away.

Perhaps it was rain with some thunder in the mix.

 

* * *

 

_Dear diary,_

_Hi. I’m currently sitting in my room on a Friday night. Alone._

Veronica looked up from her diary to look through her window. Not much was visible - just some violently swaying trees and pouring rain, along with the muffled sound of water splattering and the occasional clap of thunder.

_When I said before that sitting at the table without Heather McNamara was like a rainstorm, I didn’t want to be taken literally. Thanks, God._

She took a swig of the beer that she had stolen from her parent’s cupboard. They weren’t home tonight, so it’s not like they’d ever know.

_I did what Heather told me and I kept my Friday night free. As a result, I’m sitting in my room, tipsy, and pretty miserable. I kept my night free for Heather, and it turns out she had plans elsewhere._

Her pen came close to poking a hole through the paper, that last part was written so bitterly.

_Perhaps I shouldn’t be jealous, though. Perhaps I need to remind myself that all of… that… was a casual thing. Heather had said herself that we were no more than ‘friends with benefits,’ and I had said that that’s fine. Because really, what else are we meant to be?_

She took yet another sip of the beer.

 _I know I have a crush on Heather. I know that. What I_ _don’t_ _know is if I can picture actually_ _dating_ _her. Because it’s… Heather._

Her eyes wandered over to her bed, and she grimaced.

 _I like Heather. I think she_ _can_ _be a_ _nice_ _fun person to be around. But can you imagine any feelings developing? Serious ones, I mean. Not this dumb infatuation I have with her. I know I sure can’t._

Dammit. Her beer bottle was empty.

 _And even if I_ _could,_ _I just can’t imagine the same happening with her. Is that girl even capable of romantic attraction? When was the last time she had a serious relationship? Heather Duke herself said that a ‘date’ in her language means ‘hookup.’ And I’m one of them. It just so happens I’m in her friendship circle._

She leaned back in her chair and glanced up at the clock that sat on her nightstand. She had to squint to see what it read clearly.

Twenty five to eight. Wonderful.

_But enough of Heather. Let’s talk about Heather._

She adjusted her monocle.

_She’s been on my mind all day. I know people get upset all the time, but seeing Heather M look so sad is like staring into the eyes of a kicked puppy. I honestly feel guilty for giving her an absence note. Perhaps if I hadn’t, I could’ve gotten her to stay and talk about whatever’s bothering her._

She then looked at her nightstand again. Specifically at her phone.

Hm.

She dropped her pen and stood up from her chair, then made her way over to her bed. She hopped onto the mattress and grabbed her phone, then dialed Heather McNamara’s number.

She lay back on her bed as she waited for an answer.

And after a while of ringing, nothing came. No one picked up.

“Crap,” she grunted, before dialing the number again. “Come on, Heather, I just wanna check you’re okay.”

She waited for a while longer. Still nothing.

“Ugh.” She groaned and slammed the phone down, then glanced out the window.

If there was a way to present her emotions without words, the weather did exactly that.

 _Why wasn’t she picking up?_ she thought, frowning. _Is she out?_ She shook her head. _No, no, she’s still grounded. She’s definitely in._

She sat up on her bed.

_I feel guilty just leaving her all alone. But what else am I supposed to do? Go to her house?_

She stared at the window for a second longer.

 _Actually, I could definitely do that._ A clap of thunder sounded right after that thought, but she didn’t care. It may be a fairly long walk -  forty or fifty minutes, maybe - but she had nothing else to do but worry by staying here, as well as bring herself down the more she thought about the fact that Heather Chandler was probably fucking someone right now.

Fuck it.

She shoved essentials into her handbag (her purse and her diary), wrapped herself up in gloves, her old scarf and the best coat she had, and walked outside. She was immediately met with chaos; rain was riding the wind, being pulled in all different directions, and more often than not slapping her in the face and drenching her hair. She debated whether or not this was a good idea, and considered just returning to her house, but she shook that thought off.

She was already out here. She was going to Heather’s house.

The journey was rough and felt longer than usual. She was constantly being thrown backwards by the wind, constantly getting rainwater in her eye and jump-scared by claps of thunder. She felt like the walk was never going to end, but soon enough, she entered the richest part of the neighbourhood, and soon enough came across the familiar, huge house that was McNamara’s. She very nearly made her way up to the front door, but reminded herself that she was still grounded, and doing so would simply get her kicked out.

She sighed. Another method was needed here.

She scurried around the house and down the side, up until she made it to the window of her bedroom. She gazed up at it for a moment, debating on how to go about this, all the while blinking the raindrops out of her eyes.

She then picked up a twig and threw it, only to watch the wind carry it away from the window. Shit.

She managed to find a stone and threw that. While it did bounce of the window, it was no match for the roaring of the wind and rain. Ugh.

This called for desperate measures.

Veronica decided she’d blame the bits of alcohol in her system for deciding the climb up a wet, muddy tree. It was more difficult than last time, obviously. Her feet slipped it and it was a struggle for her gloved hands to get a grip, but she managed.

While crouching on the small dip of the tree, her mind flashed back to when she’d been sitting on here with Heather and Heather, specifically when she’d had to guide Chandler up the branch due to her fear of heights. A strangely good memory, disregarding the part where she almost fell off of the window sill, that is.

She may have been tipsy, but she knew better than to go at a quick pace along a wet branch. She was careful with her footing, gripping onto the ridges in the bark as tightly as she could.

Then she got to the end, and she stared at the window sill which looked like it could be a waterfall with all the water splashing over the edge. She thought about stepping onto it, but with how slippery it looked, that didn’t sound very wise when she had nothing to hold on to.

Instead, she reached out and knocked on the window.

When she got no reply, she knocked again. And again.

Then she breathed out a sigh of relief when the curtains opened and revealed Heather McNamara on the other side, looking confused. She tapped the window again to gesture her to look her way. The blonde did indeed turn, and she jolted in surprise.

“Oops, sorry,” she said, even though she was pretty sure she couldn’t hear her. The window was then slid open and Heather peeked out as far as she could without getting wet.

“Veronica?” Her eyes widened. “What are you doing here?”

“Mind if I come in first?” she said, her voice quite loud to override the sound of the rain and wind. “It’s not exactly pleasant out here.”

Heather stared at her blankly.

“Well, I don’t want you to fall and die.” She reached out her hand towards her, and Veronica gladly grabbed onto it. Heather helped her slip in doors, and Veronica could’ve just fell into a deep sleep right there and then. Heather’s room was so _warm_ compared to outside. And dry. Also a good thing.

“God, did you _walk_ here?” Heather asked as she closed the window, muffling the sounds from outside.

“Yeah,” Veronica replied as she slipped her shoes off. “Uhh… where should I put these? They’re pretty muddy.”

Heather just took them out of her hand.

“I don’t really mind,” she said as she placed them just under the window. “If you want, you can dump everything else there to.” She pointed to the area where she’d placed her shoes, and Veronica obliged. She felt free with all the wet clothes off, and she grinned.

“Now what are you doing here again?” Heather asked, walking over to her bed to sit. Veronica followed on.

“I came to check on you,” Veronica replied. “You looked really upset earlier.”

Heather looked a little taken aback.

“So you walked in a rainstorm for an hour?”

“Yeah.”

A corner of her mouth quirked up.

“Thanks.” She then brought a finger up to hold up the ends of her dripping hair. “Aren’t you cold?”

Veronica chuckled. “Cold is an understatement.”

Heather frowned. “Do you want a blanket?”

Veronica giggled. “I’ll be fine. I might need a towel, though.” She glanced at the few wet drops on the yellow duvet. “Before I turn your room into a pool.”

“I don’t think there’s enough water to make a puddle, but okay,” Heather said, before standing up. Veronica watched her as she grabbed a towel from the knob of her closet, then threw it over to her. Veronica caught it and immediately began to rub it over her hair, up until it was fuzzed up and a mess. Heather didn’t sit down, only watched and snickered when the towel was removed, then let out a (weak) giggle when she saw how much of a mess her hair was afterwards.

“You need a brush,” Heather said, reaching into the drawer of her nightstand and placing her hairbrush next to her. Veronica smiled at her.

“Thanks,” she replied as she guided the bristles through her wet locks. Heather sat down next to her as she did so, playing with the hem of her skirt as she listened to the sound of the brush breaking through any knots.

Veronica gazed at her during the drawn out silence between them. Her brown eyes were darting across the carpet, looking foggy and distant. Her feet would bounce up and down and tap the floor, and her body swayed ever so slightly that it would create a faint creaking sound on the mattress.

“Here,” Veronica then said, holding the brush out in front of her. Heather seemed to be snapped out of her thoughts and she hesitantly took hold of the brush. “Thanks my hair needed some care after walking through all that wind.” She offered a light chuckle, but Heather didn’t make a sound as she returned the brush to the draw. Veronica’s brow knitted.

“Hey,” she said softly as she shifted a little closer. “What’s gotten you down?” She tried to catch her eye, but she kept looking away. “You can tell me.”

That seemed to convince her to look back at her.

“Nothing,” she murmured. “It’s silly.”

Veronica frowned. “I’m sure it isn’t, if it’s made you this upset.” She then shuffled further along the bed, up until she was leaning against the headpost. When Heather stared after her blankly, Veronica patted the space next to her to gesture her to come over. At first she didn’t respond, but she soon crawled over and slumped onto the space. Veronica nudged her gently with her elbow, which got her to look back up at her. “You can vent if you want.”

Heather frowned. “You’ll probably think it’s silly,” she repeated. Veronica frowned, before gently placing a hand over hers. Heather seemed to lean into her touch

“I won’t, I promise.”

Heather gave her a half smile. “Alright.” Before saying much more, she twisted around, away from Veronica, and grabbed something that had been under her pillow. Veronica watched with interest as she pulled out a yellow teddy bear and settled it in the middle of her crossed legs, holding onto it. “So, um, something shitty happened today.”

“What was it?” Veronica asked, twisting her body around to face her more directly. Heather pursed her lips for a moment.

“I got called out of math today, and, um…”

“Sounds like a good thing to me,” Veronica quipped. Heather glanced up at her with a furrowed brow, which Veronica took as a sign to not make any more comments.

“I was taken into my PE teacher’s office, and they told me that they… found out about this.” She pointed to the bandage that still remained over the bridge of her nose. “I mean, I know they already _knew_ , but they told me they found out how I got it.” Her voice grew a little quieter, and she ran her thumb over the plush toy in her grip. Veronica raised her brows as she waited for her to continue.

“Apparently people had told them I got into a fight, and…” She bit her lip which Veronica saw had began to quiver. Oh no. “They said… said…” She was interrupted by a whimper, and Veronica gasped.

“Oh, Heather, it’s okay!” She reached out to hold her by the shoulders, and Heather immediately fell into her hold. Veronica was met with light sobs beating against her chest, and she could do nothing but run her hand up and down her back.

“What did they say?” Veronica murmured, leaning a little closer to her ear. Heather leaned back to look back up at her, one eye glistening with tears, the other hidden by her bangs.

“They kicked me off the cheerleading team!” she blurted out, returning to sobbing on Veronica’s shoulder as soon as the words were out. Veronica widened her eyes.

“What? Why would they do that?” The cries grew a little louder, and she ran her fingers through her hair. “You’re cheerleading captain! I don’t see why-”

“Because I got into a fight!” Heather cut in, not lifting her head off of Veronica. “They didn’t want that representing the-” she let out another sob “-the school.”

Veronica’s nose scrunched up. “That’s ridiculous. It wasn’t even on school grounds!” She tightened her hold on Heather a little, and Heather did the same as she let out a string of cries.

“I-I tried to tell them that!” she bawled. “But they told me since students alread- already know, they had no choice but to-”

“That’s so bullshit!” Veronica barked, burying her face into her blonde curls. “I’m so sorry, Heather, that’s… really unfair.”

“I _know_ !” Heather cried. Veronica could feel her neck grow wet with tears, but she didn’t really mind. “And it’s not like I’m a violent person or anythin’, I just-” She let out a whimper. “I just wanted to defend Heather, is all, but I couldn’t _tell_ them that!” Her volume got a little high with each word. “I couldn’t tell ‘em I punched someone because they tried to date rape my friend, could I?”

Veronica gazed her her solemnly. “I suppose not.”

Heather leaned back from her, mascara slightly smudged and sniffling. “It’s not fair!” she yelled, her sudden volume spurt making Veronica jump. “I worked _so hard_ for that role!” In looking into her eyes, Veronica could see less sadness and more _anger_ , something she so rarely saw in her. “Then they take it away because some people snitched on me!” She let out a few more whimpers. “It’s not fair,” she repeated.

Veronica furrowed a brow as she caressed her arm. “Who would’ve snitched?”

Heather’s eyes narrowed a little.

“Someone at the _party_ ,” she muttered. “And I _know_ someone who was at the party, and…” She looked down at her plush toy. “It might’ve been to get back at me.”

Veronica tilted her head. “Get back at you? For what?”

Heather cringed a little. “Uhh… same person who got me _temporarily_ kicked from the team,” her words grew a little bitter. “So me and Heather… um…” She placed the bear back on her pillow so that she could hug her knees. Veronica waited for her to continue.

“You…”

“We… put condoms in her bag and made it so they’d spill out,” she said quickly, her mouth hidden by her knees.

Veronica paused for a second.

“Wait a minute… is this Ashley Reynolds we’re talking about? The one who people keep saying is a slut?”

Heather dared to peek at her.

“...Maybe.”

Veronica gave an exasperated sigh. “ _You_ were the one who started that?”

“In my defense!” Heather’s hands shot out in front of her. “It wasn’t my idea, it was _Heather’s_. I just…”

“Egged her on?”

Heather slowly nodded.

“Yeah.” She pursed her lips. “Also it was funny, so…”

“But why did you do it?” Veronica demanded. Heather winced.

“Like I said! She got me kicked off the team _just_ so that she could take my place for a week.” The corners of her eyes then creased. “And now I’m kicked off forever…” Her voice came out as a whimper.

Veronica gave a sigh. “I mean… you shouldn’t have done that, Heather,” she shifted over so that she would be sitting by her side. “But it also sucks that this happened to you.”

Heather nodded again. “Maybe it was a little mean, but…” She scowled. “But the rumor’s only gonna last a couple of weeks. I just lost _years_ of work!” She threw her hands into the air, and Veronica had to dodge them to avoid getting hit in the face. “ _¡_ _Mierda!_ ”

She was surprised to hear that come out as a near screech. Heather then fell backwards onto the bed and glared at the ceiling above.

“Sorry for getting mad, Ronnie.”

“It’s alright. Better out than in.” While Veronica _was_ fine with Heather letting her anger out, she had to admit it was an odd sight. She’d always seen the blonde as a ball of sunshine, who just so happened to have enough power to burn anyone who wronged her. So perhaps now she still _is_ a ball of sunshine, only on a raging hot summer’s day.

Heather let out another groan, and squeezed her eyes shut. “I worked so hard. _So hard_ for that role! Ronnie, you have _no idea_!”

“Well, no, I’ve only known you for three months.”

“ _Exactly!_ ” Heather took in a deep breath to let it out again. “I’m just…” Veronica saw a twinkle in her eye, and she thought she might start crying again. “It’s gone. It’s gone, and I’m _never_ getting it back!” Veronica was right, she did indeed start crying again. She frowned, and patted her on the head.

“I’m really sorry, Heather,” she crooned. Heather gazed up at her sadly, tears rolling down her temple. She looked so drained, so dull. Veronica sighed. “If you want to be left alone then I can leave if you-”

“No, no, don’t,” Heather quickly said, sitting up the link arms. “I don’t want you walking in the rain-” She was interrupted by a loud clap of thunder. Veronica flinched, but Heather seemed fairly indifferent. “Also… I feel a little bit better?” Though her eyes were still watery, the corner of her mouth picked up, to Veronica’s delight.

“I’m glad,” she said, smiling. “Just… let it all out if need be.”

Heather gave her a solemn look. “I have. All day.” She pursed her lips. “I’ve been crying all day.”

“...Oh.” Veronica grimaced.

“But it feels better doing it in front of someone,” she added, sitting back up and swiping at her face with the back of her hand, clearing off the drops of tears. “I… I usually don’t do that.”

“I know,” Veronica said. “Heather and Heather told me.”

Heather frowned. “Oh.”

“Don’t you talk to them?” _Kind of a dumb question, as if either of them could be emotionally supportive-_

“Yeah.”

Oh.

“Are they nice about… whatever’s bothering you?”

Heather slowly nodded. “Yeah. Heather especially.”

Veronica blinked at her. “Heather…?”

“Chandler.”

Bigger oh.

“So… why don’t you talk to them more often?”

Heather frowned and averted her gaze. “I just don’t.” She began to rock back and forth ever so slightly. “I feel bad sitting people down to cry in front of them.”

“What about me? You just cried in front of me, right?”

“Yeah, that’s because I feel bad if I _don’t_ !” She gestured over to the window. “You walked in the rain to ask me what’s wrong! I can’t just _not_ cry after all that.”

Veronica stifled a chuckle. “I suppose you’re right.”

Then there was a pause between them both.

“So, you feel better now?” Veronica chipped, gazing at her hopefully. Heather pouted.

“I mean… I’m less sad now and more…” Her fingers curled to grip her duvet. “More pissed. I’m pissed.”

Veronica blinked at her clenching fists. “Maybe punch something?” she suggested. Heather looked up at her, eyes a little wide. “It helps me whenever I get pissed off.”

“Are you sure?”

Veronica gave an amused huff. “So long as that something isn’t me.” She glanced at those muscles rippling under her olive skin. “I feel like you could knock me unconscious if you wanted to.”

Heather lifted her fist. “Oh, I definitely could.” Veronica’s eyes widened. “But I won’t, because I like you.”

“Okay, good,” Veronica said, slightly relieved. She then glanced at the many pillows on her bed, and grabbed as many as she could to create a pile. “Go ahead and punch this.” She grinned. “Maybe imagine it’s Ashley or something.”

A ghost of a smirk appeared on Heather’s lips. “Maybe Ashley _and_ Courtney, because I’m pretty sure she had something to do with it too.”

Veronica arched a brow at the brunette’s name. “Not that I have a problem with that, but what makes you think that?”

“She’s friends with Ashley,” Heather explained. “Maybe they teamed up? Especially after that fight you and Heather had with her on Monday.” She coiled her fists back, ready to strike a first punch.

Veronica thought about her statement for a moment.

“You may be right.”

She was then caught off guard by Heather slamming her fist into the pile of pillows, flinching when she did so. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea to sit directly behind the pillows, but she was sure that there was enough there to shield her from _actually_ getting punched.

“Did that feel any good?”

Heather looked up at her with a faint smile, and nodded.

“Yeah. I’m gonna do it again.”

She did exactly that. Then she did it again. And again. Each time she did, there was a little flicker in her eye. Something light. Perhaps it was an angry flame. Perhaps it was an excited spark. Either way, it was working.

Soon enough, she slowed, and eventually stopped, her breaths a little heavy.

“You done?” Veronica asked. Heather nodded, letting her arms flop by her sides.

“Yeah.”

Veronica threw the pillows back into their original place and took a seat next to her.

“Feel any better?”

McNamara gave a light shrug.

“I suppose so.”

Veronica gave a sympathetic smile, before wrapping and arm around her to pull her in for a hug. Heather fell right into it, nestling her head into the crook of Veronica’s neck and holding onto the arm that was wrapped around her torso. Veronica thought she might hear her cry yet again, but she didn’t. Instead, she just stayed in that position, completely silent. Veronica let her head rest on hers, and her thumb brushed up and down the yellow fabric of her shirt.

She wasn’t sure how much time passed until Heather spoke again.

“I feel so shit,” she muttered, her breath hitting Veronica’s neck. “What am I supposed to do now?” She shuffled a little closer to her. “I thought I’d be able to end the year as captain… all the shows I could’ve done. Now what do I do?” She shifted so that she would rest her chin on her shoulder, and when looking down at those hazel eyes, Veronica saw them wide and glistening, a twinge of fear mixed in with them.

“There are plenty of things you can do, Heather,” Veronica said reassuringly, lightly brushing the blonde bangs away from her eye, though they immediately fell back into place. “I know cheerleading was your passion and all, but…” She frowned. “There’s plenty of other things you can do.”

Heather looked unconvinced.

“I hate having to try new things,” she muttered, her gaze dropping away from Veronica’s. “I never know what to expect.” Her head drooped on her shoulder. “I was fine being cheerleading captain. I knew what to do. Everything was _fine_.” Her voice was muffled by her shoulder, but Veronica could understand her well enough. “Everything’s _fucked_.”

“Oh… Mac- oh, wait, can’t call you that,” she muttered, rolling her eyes. “Claimed by _Heather_ , of course.”

Heather glanced up at her again, she let out a light huff.

“It’s okay. She’s not around, so you can use it all you like.”

Veronica looked at her doubtfully. “I’d rather not get into the habit.”

A light giggle escaped the blonde. “Maybe think up a nickname, then?” She tilted her head a little. “You’re the only one who doesn’t have one for me.”

Veronica gave a thoughtful hum as she tried to think of possible names for her. Mac was taken, M was also gone, what more was there?

“Do you have a middle name?” Veronica asked. Heather lifted herself off of her shoulder.

“Yes, but you are _not_ calling me ‘Elle,’” she said dryly.

Veronica raised her brows. “Your middle name is ‘Elle’?” The corner of her mouth curled up. “That’s really cute!”

Heather simpered at that, and she angled her head down a little.

“Thanks, Ronnie, but I don’t think it suits me.” A light chuckle escaped her. “I don’t think I’d be able to get used to it, anyway.”

Veronica smiled. “That’s fair. Hmm…” She shuffled around to face her head-on, tucking her knees up to let her arms rest on them. “Uhh… Mac… McNamara… Nam? No, that’s silly…”

As she was lost in thought, Heather’s bright pink lips curled up into a smile ever so slowly.

“Ra… Amara... “ Then a thought popped into mind. “Mara? What about Mara?”

Veronica saw her eyes lighten up a little, sparking some much-needed warmth in her.

“I like Mara,” she said, smiling.

Veronica grinned. “Mara it is.”

Heather giggled. “Say…” She turned towards the window. “Do you want to stay the night? It feels a lot better having someone to talk too…” Veronica could notice the timidness in her voice, and she smiled and nodded.

“Sure! Saves me from sitting in my room feeling down, anyway,” her tone sounded a bit more bitter than it was suppose to. Heather blinked at her.

“Down?” she echoed. “Why? What’s wrong?”

Veronica pursed her lips, then shook her head. “Nothing.” _Heather._ “Just a bit of a rough day.” _Thinking about Heather._

Heather frowned. “Then you’re staying for a sleepover! I don’t want you feeling sad.” She latched onto Veronica’s arm, in that way she’d seen her do with Chandler’s arm, and even Duke’s on occasion. “And you don’t even have to climb down the tree tomorrow! I’m un-grounded, so I can just let you out the front door.”

Veronica laughed. “That makes me feel a little better.” She glanced over to the branch swaying ever so slightly in the wind. “Probably a dumb idea to climb the tree before.”

Heather suddenly looked serious, and the grip around her arm tightened. “It was! It was raining and windy. What if you slipped? Or got blown off?”

Veronica gave a light huff. “Must’ve been the alcohol. Stops me from being smart.”

Heather’s eyes widened. “You’re _drunk_ ?” She tugged on her arm a little. “You climbed the tree when you were _dru_ -”

“No, no, it’s okay!” She patted her on the shoulder reassuringly. “I’m only tipsy. I had a bottle of beer before I left.”

Heather eyed her suspiciously. “How strong was it?”

“Four percent.”

“I’ll let it slide. This time.” She gave her a stern look. “But don’t do that again.”

“You have my word.” Veronica grinned as she held up her hand, all fingers folded apart from her pinkie. Heather stared at it cluelessly.

“What?”

“Pinkie promise. I won’t do it again,” she explained, edging her hand closer to her. Heather lifted her hand hesitantly, before locking pinkies with her. Veronica noticed how warm her hand was.

“I’ll have to make rules,” Heather said, retrieving back her hand. “Rule number one: don’t climb the tree without me at the window.”

Veronica nodded. “Got it.”

“Rule number two: don’t climb the tree when drunk, or you’re a dumbass.”

Veronica chuckled. “Yeah, I guess I am.”

“And rule number three, don’t climb it _alone_. Have at least one other Heather with you.”

She gave her a thumbs up. “Understood.”

“Good.” She then released her arm, and while the room was by no means cold, Veronica couldn’t help but feel a slight chill brush over her arm without her hands wrapped around her.

“So… what do you wanna do?” She stared up at her. “I wanna do something fun… y’know. After a pretty bad day.” The somber frown returned, if only briefly. “Just to… um... “

“Forget about all that? Sure.” Hoping to catch her gaze, Veronica took hold of both her hands, her grip as gentle as Heather’s usual tone. Heather did indeed snap her head up as soon as Veronica’s hands cupped her own. “It’s been a rough day- rough _week_ for that matter.” She lightly drew circles over the back of her hands with her thumbs, though was put off by another clap of thunder. “How about we just have a bit of fun tonight?”

 _Because clearly_ one _Heather is having_ plenty _of fun right now,_ she was so, so tempted to add, but she swallowed the urge back down.

“Yeah!” Heather said, grinned a bright smile that might as well have been glowing. Though, against the dull, grim weather outside, Veronica could describe her as a good replacement for the sun. “How about I go make some popcorn? Or waffles?” Her hands gripped onto Veronica’s excitedly with each word, up until it was a solid grasp. “Maybe some beer?”

Veronica just couldn’t hold back a grin. It was as if her eagerness was contagious.

“Sounds great, Mara.” Her grin grew a little mischievous. “I especially like the beer part.”

Heather snickered. “Me too.” She then let go of her hands and rolled off the bed. “Wanna come down to the kitchen with me?”

Veronica glanced at the door cautiously. “What if your dad sees me?”

Heather gave her an eye roll. “It’s _Friday_ , Ronnie, he’s always out the house.”

Veronica wasn’t sure if she’d heard a hint of despair in her voice or not, but if she had, it didn’t matter because Heather had grabbed her wrist and was pulling her out of her room, only letting go once they were down the corridor. The very _long_ corridor.

“I’ll never get over how big your house is,” she mused, staring at the patterned dark yellow wallpaper and the beige carpet. “Though is there really only _one_ hallway upstairs? It looks different from the outside.”

Heather shot her an odd look, stopping just before they got to the banister of the stairs.

“Of course not!” She placed a hand on a door that Veronica assumed was a room.

Then she opened it, and she realised she had assumed wrong.

“Oh my God.”

Heather gave a giggle. “Down there’s dad’s room, another restroom and a couple more rooms to just… chill in.” She shrugged as she shut the door. “I never really go down there. I have an unspoken agreement with dad that _this_ corridor is mine-” she gestured to the hallway they currently stood in, “and _that_ one is his,” she pointed to the door. Without another word, she began to make her way to the stairs, and Veronica followed on.

During the moment they didn’t speak, Veronica realised there was a slight echo of her footsteps as she made her way down each step, just showing how big the hallway was.

“I’d _love_ to live in a place like this,” she murmured, staring up at the golden chandelier hanging from the ceiling. While doing so, she hadn’t noticed the small figure darting over to her once she reached the bottom of the staircase, up until she felt fur graze over her legs. She looked down and gasped, seeing that Foxy had come to say hello. “Foxy!” she exclaimed, stopping to stroke him. Heather giggled.

“He really likes you, huh?” she stated, leaning against the banister. Veronica scratched the back of his ear and cooed at the cute purring sounds he made.

“Good. I love him. He’s my child.”

“He’s _my_ child,” Heather retorted playfully. “But there’s no harm in having another parent.”

She then walked over to lift him off the ground, hugging him against her chest and letting him rub his head over her cheek. Veronica felt her heart swell at the sight.

“Poor guy knew I was upset today,” she crooned, turning to walk towards the kitchen. “He kept on trying to cheer me up, but I was just so sad.”

Veronica pouted sadly. “He must be happy to see you smiling again,” she said. Heather beamed.

“Yeah,” she replied, planting a quick kiss on her cat’s head before allowing him to jump out of his arms. Heather watched him reach the kitchen before either of them could, and she chuckled. “Oh, you want _food_ don’t you?” She pushed the kitchen door open and glanced at her swatch. “I suppose you can have a treat before bed.”

“What treats?” Veronica asked, leaning against the table in the middle of the kitchen, watching Heather scrounge through her cupboard.

“Sometimes I’ll give him a treat when he’s been good,” she said, pulling out a can of tuna. “And he’s been really good today, so he’s earned it.”

Veronica kept her distance from the can - she couldn’t deny that she disliked the smell of tuna. Though, in getting a closer look, she saw that Heather was holding her breath, with how stiff she had begun to move. She quickly scraped some out into a cat bowl on the floor, before dashing back to the cupboard and shoving the can back inside and slamming it shut. After that, she let out a long gasp.

“Not a fan of the smell either, huh?” she joked. Heather shook her head.

“It makes me nauseous,” she muttered. “I hope he appreciates what I have to put up with,” she said, pointing the the cat currently scoffing down the bits of fish.

“It looks like he does,” Veronica commented. “So, what we making?”

Heather tapped her fingers on the kitchen counter. “Popcorn and waffles?”

“Sounds good.”

Veronica went over to help gather the waffles and popcorn out of the cupboards, and took on responsibility of putting the Jiffy Pop in the microwave while Heather sorted out the waffles. While they rested in the toaster, she brought out a bottle of syrup and some beer bottles.

“I should make sure I don’t get _too_ drunk,” Veronica said as she watched the popcorn spin around in the microwave. “I don’t want myself getting a hangover tomorrow.”

“How come?”

Veronica shot her an amused look. “I mean, I’ve never _wanted_ a hangover, Heather.”

“Oh, right.”

“But especially not tomorrow. I’m meeting up with my friends for a movie night.”

“Oh, that’s fine then.” Heather picked up a beer and read the label. “These aren’t very strong anyway.”

Veronica lightly chuckled, and couldn’t help but appreciate the lack of comments about her mentioning her other friends. Something that was rare to escape from when hanging out with a certain _other_ Heather.

 _Ugh, just don’t think about her, Veronica,_ she hissed at herself. _Especially since she’s clearly not thinking about you._

“Do you wanna do that tonight? Watch a movie, I mean?”

Veronica shrugged as she watched the bag begin to rumble as popcorn began to pop. Heather gasped at the sound, then came over to watch.

“If you want. I don’t really mind.”

“We’ll think of something!” Heather exclaimed, before the beeping of the microwave sounded. “Mind getting that out for me? I’ll get a bowl.” She then maneuvered around her to go to some other cupboard. As Veronica opened the microwave door, she watched Heather as she effortlessly leaped onto the counter and opened a cupboard, kneeling up to grab a bowl from the top shelf. While doing so, Veronica could see that the muscles in her arms were matched by the ones in her legs, particularly her thighs, ones she’d never noticed before now.

 _Damn, I always thought of Mara as a soft marshmallow,_ she mused, gazing at her small, yet hard figure. _Turns out she’s a roasted marshmallow. Still soft in the middle, of course, but_ goddamn _she’s hard on the outside._ She stifled a snicker when she thought back to exactly a week ago, when she punched David. The more she thought about it, the more she wished she was there to see it. Not only to see blood coming out of the asshole’s mouth, but to also witness just how _hard_ she could hit a punch-

“Ronnie?”

She blinked and snapped her head up to meet Heather’s hazel gaze (wait, where had she been looking again?)

“Yeah?”

It took her a second to realise she was holding out a bowl in front of her, and she darted forward to take hold of it and went to pour the popcorn inside.

“Thanks!” she chipped, before leaping back onto the floor again. Just as she did, the waffles sprung out of the toaster. “They smell great!” she commented, before darting back over to the toaster. She grabbed a plate and placed the waffles on it. “Do want one or two? Because I can make more.”

Veronica sheepishly grinned. “Two, if that’s not too much trouble.” She’d made herself dinner due to her parents being out, and by ‘dinner’ she meant some cheap packets of rice that take five minutes to cook in the microwave. “I’m starving.”

“Sure thing,” she said, before throwing another two into the toaster. She then grabbed the syrup and squeezed the bottle, letting the golden liquid seep out. Veronica noticed how she swirled the bottom in a pattern - round in a circle twice, then zig zag across. Then she repeated the notion to a tee.

“Want whipped cream?” she then asked. Veronica’s eyes lit up.

“Hell yeah.”

Heather giggled a giggle as sweet as the syrup she had just placed on the table, before going over to the fridge and grabbing some whipped cream. “On the side or…?”

“Side.”

Heather did exactly that, her hand movements careful. Had Veronica been in control of the can, she would’ve sprayed the cream at random, but Heather slowly curved the can around to make an insanely neat white splodge on the side, with the little _flick_ on the top that you see professionals do.

She then handed her the plate. Veronica stared at the plate, stunned.

“Is it okay?” she asked, jumping up to sit on the table in the middle of the room. Veronica looked up at her.

“It’s scarily good,” she said, coming to join her on the table. “You have mad decoration skills.”

“Aw, thank you!” she said, gingerly smiling. She then squirted some whipped cream onto her finger. “It’s really fun.” She licked the whipped cream off her finger.

“You looked like you did it without thinking,” Veronica stated, placing the plate next to her. She’d save that for later.

“I guess I do,” Heather said, shrugging. “I dunno. It’s like…” She held up the whipped cream can. “It’s fun? Decorating, I mean.”

Veronica watched her intently as she squirted out a circle on her finger.

“It’s really easy for me to do,” she said, before licking the cream off again. “Especially when I’m waiting for something.”

Before Veronica could ask any more questions, the waffles in the toaster bounced up. Heather grinned, then hopped down to place them on a plate and decorate her own waffles. She used the same method for the syrup as she had with Veronica’s, but when it came to whipped cream, she swirled it around on top of them rather than on the side.

She grabbed her plate with one hand and the bowl of popcorn in the other, then swung around to face Veronica.

“Back upstairs, then?”

Veronica nodded, before grabbing her own plate and the beer bottles and following Heather back to her room.

“Do you want a change of clothes, by the way?” Heather asked as she set the plate and bowl down on the bed, next to where Veronica lay. “Can’t be comfortable sleeping in _that_.” She pointed to her blue blazer and skirt, and Veronica gave a light huff.

“Yeah, if you don’t mind,” she replied, twisting open the cap of her beer. Heather gave a smile before leaving the room, and Veronica waited for her to return. She soon came back with a dark green shirt and grey shorts.

“Are these okay?” she asked.

“Yeah, toss ‘em,” Veronica told her, throwing her hands up in the air. Heather did so, and she caught them with ease. “Thanks!”

“You’re welcome,” she replied, before walking over to her wardrobe. “If you want you can change in another room and I’ll get changed here.”

Veronica took a quick swig of her beer. “Sure! I’ll be right back.”

She scurried out of Heather’s room and made her way to the bathroom, making a quick change.

She quickly slipped her skirt off and replaced it with shorts, then took her blazer and shirt off.

She paused when she saw her reflection.

She moved a little closer to the mirror on the wall, getting a better view of the bitemarks littered over her collarbone, shoulders and… other places that were a little more intimate. They were faint by now - now only red splodges rather than dark purples. But they were there.

She frowned as she ran a finger over them. They didn’t hurt anymore. She hardly even felt them.

She then glanced at the counter, and memories began to flood back to her. The first time Heather had kissed her (sober) had been right where she was leaning.

 _It’s just a casual thing_ , she reminded herself, staring at her reflection dead in the eye. _It’s nothing more than a casual thing._

But she had to wonder about it. _How_ had it become a casual thing? How did Heather-fucking-Chandler end up kissing and fucking _her_ out of all people? _Why_ did she, for that matter?

 _She’ll never tell me,_ she thought bitterly. _She’s not exactly good at eye-to-eye conversation, now, is she?_

Veronica shook the thought off as she picked up the green shirt to throw it on, covering up Heather’s dirty work in the process.

 _Did she choose me because she… cares?_ A thought came to mind. A ridiculous one.

 _No. She wouldn’t,_ she told herself. _Even if she does care about me like she does Mara, that’s not why she’s doing any of_ this. She pressed down on her shoulder, a place where Heather seemed to love to bite the most (with the exception of… other places), hoping to feel _some_ sort of sting that would echo the feeling of her lips. With enough pressure, she found the slightest bit, a fading ghost of her touch. But it just wasn’t enough. It didn’t feel the same.

 _She probably does care,_ she mused, albeit hopefully, _I doubt even_ she _can forget about… last Friday. And she seemed so…_ What was the right word? _Open? No._ She stared at her reflection, looking for an answer. _Vulnerable?_ She sighed. _Yeah. That._ She shook her head. _But it would be stupid to think that would last. She’s still the Demon Queen we all know and hate(?)_

 

* * *

 

“So do we have any plans for tomorrow?” Veronica asked, taking her seat next to Heather. Heather shot her an odd look in response.

“Plans?” she echoed. “What makes you think we had plans?”

Veronica blinked at her. “You told me on Monday to keep my Friday free,” she said, smiling hopefully. “I assumed we had a party or something.”

Heather deadpanned at her.

“No.”

“Oh.” Veronica gave a shrug. “Well, any plans with Heather and Heather?” She glanced at the side of the table that was yet to be occupied.

“No,” she said again, now looking away from her. Veronica had also noticed that she had shifted further down the bench, if not by an inch. She furrowed a brow.

“Well…” Her mouth twitched. “I’m free tomorrow, either way. So if you want to-”

“ _I’m_ not,” Heather suddenly snapped, still not looking away from her plate. Veronica stared at her, feeling lost without the usual detailed replies from her.

“Oh…” She pursed her lips, her eyes beginning to fly around wildly. “What are you doi-”

“Could you not be so nosy?” Heather hissed, shooting her a warning side glance. Veronica held that side glance as best as she could while it lasted, before she went back to looking away from her. Veronica grimaced.

“Sorry,” she muttered, staring down at her own plate. “I was just curious.”

“Uh-huh. Sure,” she heard Heather grunt, her tone bitter. Veronica winced, feeling the insincerity in her words.

 _Okay, sure,_ maybe _I was hoping you were free,_ she though, twirling her fork around in her meal. _But can you blame me for thinking that you’d be_ ecstatic _for asking?_ Her mind flashed back to the weekend, and she couldn’t tell if she wanted to smile or frown.

She dared to look at her again, and she thankfully didn’t acknowledge her doing so. She seemed to focused on… nothing. Her eyes were busy elsewhere, scanning over the cafeteria, maybe? Perhaps she was just looking for-

“God, that line was _so_ long.”

Veronica was snapped out of her thoughts by the sound of Heather McNamara’s voice. She snapped her head forward and saw that the blonde had taken a seat just in front of her, while Duke sat opposite Chandler.

“Tell me why I waited with you again?” Duke asked her, and Veronica realised she didn’t have a lunch tray of her own. Perhaps she would’ve shown concern if this wasn’t a common routine.

Okay, lies, she was still very concerned, but not the point.

“To be a good friend?” Heather guessed, smiling hopefully. Duke rolled her eyes, though the corner of her mouth had quirked up.

“If that helps you sleep at night.”

“Thanks. It will,” McNamara replied, before catching Veronica’s eye. “Hi, Veronica!”

Veronica fluttered her lashes, having realised her vision had gone murky.

“Hey,” she replied dryly. Heather didn’t seem to notice.

“How’s your day been?” she asked, sounding genuinely interested. Veronica gave a huff that came from an emotion made from a blend of thankful and relief. At least _someone_ was giving her the time of day.

“Alright, I guess,” she replied. “As well as my days go.” She offered a half-smile to her. “What about you?”

“It’s been okay. I think the week’s slowly getting better, don’t you?” With how she glanced at the other two girls, Veronica knew she was aiming that at everyone.

“Yeah, I guess,” Duke said, eyes locked with her book.

Chandler just shrugged, not giving a word. Veronica’s brow creased a little - Chandler’s silence was deafening.

“I suppose,” Veronica eventually said, trying to avert her gaze from the girl next to her. “And it’s always good to stay optimistic.”

McNamara smiled a bright smile - one she really needed right now. Just a warm ray of sunshine on this cloudy day.

 

* * *

 

She sighed, and gazed at the floor as she made her way back out the bathroom and back to Heather’s room.

And when she walked in, she was met with… colour.

“What the fu-”

“Hey, Veronica!” Heather exclaimed. “I never did show you this, did I?”

“...No, you didn’t.”

Veronica stared at her room. It would have been dark, had it not been for the bright, coloured lights colouring the room in all sorts of blues, greens, yellows… you name it.

“What is this?” she asked, still in awe. She walked further into the room, and saw Mara’s figure, only it was currently coloured in a dark blue shade. Heather giggled.

“It’s something Heather and Heather got for my birthday last year,” she said. Veronica got closer to the bed, and saw she was holding a remote. “I have extra lights around my room. They can change colour!” Heather then pressed a button, and the room turned red.

Ugh. Red.

“That hurts my eyes a little,” she muttered, sitting down next to Heather.

“Oh, do you want me to turn it off?” she asked. Veronica shook her head.

“No, it’s fine, the red’s just really bright.”

“Oh! Okay,” she said, changing the colour to a yellow. “Wait, is this too bright too?”

“It’s a little less intense,” she replied. “This colour’s alright.” She looked around the room, viewing everything with more of a golden tint. She then looked at Heather, who seemed even more yellow than she usually appeared. Her hair especially seemed to glisten under the light, looking like a candle whose flame pooled around her broad shoulders, flickering ever so gently. She wasn’t a dangerous fire, just a warm one.

“This is really cool though,” she commented. “I should get one for my room.”

“Tell me if you do,” Heather replied, before she changed the colour again. This time it was blue - a much cooler blue that seemed to lessen the tensing in her muscles that she hadn’t realised were there. “Is this one okay? Less intense, I mean?”

Veronica smiled and nodded “Yeah, I like this one.”

“Alright! Tell me if you want to change it,” she said, before placing the remote on the nightstand.

Veronica looked at Heather again, now seeing her with a blue hue. It looked strange on her - she was usually a more brighter, happier person. She could get excitable and giddy, and watching her perform as cheerleading captain could be hard to keep up with.

 _Ouch_ , she winced at her thoughts. _Probably should’ve appreciated her reign while it lasted._

But in looking at her chilled smile, her light tapping on her beer bottle and how she seemed almost fascinated by the blue hues in her room, Veronica couldn’t help but feel relieved that she’d come to check on her. To picture her still lying on her bed, school clothes still on, tears running down her soft cheeks was an unpleasant thought, to say the least.

“Say, do you feel better now?” Veronica asked, nudging her with her elbow. Heather turned to face her, then nodded.

“Yeah. I mean, everything still sucks, but at least I have alcohol.”

Veronica snickered at that. “Me too.”

Heather raised her brows at her. “Is something bothering you, Ronnie?”

Veronica hesitated for a moment.

“Just some silly things,” she said, making a dismissive hand gesture. “Nothing to worry ab-”

“I’m sure it’s not silly,” Heather said, her brows knitting. “You can tell me if you want.”

Veronica smiled sadly at her. “It’s fine, Mara. Let’s just do something fun, okay?”

Heather looked doubtful, but she nodded. “Alright. What do you wanna do?”

Veronica clicked her tongue and shrugged. “Dunno. What else do you have in this bigass room of yours?” She eyed the lights.

“A stereo, a TV… um…” She shrugged. “My belongings.”

“Okay, that’s a given,” Veronica huffed. “Say, how about we just turn some music on for a little bit? Then later we can watch a movie.”

Heather nodded. “Yeah, sure!” She placed her beer on her nightstand, then went to set the stereo up. Soon enough, music was playing. Veronica vaguely recognized the song’s rhythm, but she decided leaning back against the mountain of silky soft pillows with her waffles on her lap, letting the lyrics and instruments enter one ear and out the other was a more relaxing approach.

“Thanks for the waffles, by the way,” she said through a mouthful of sugar and syrup. Heather grinned.

“It’s fine. I quite like cooking anyway,” she responded, taking a bite of her own waffle.

“And decorating,” Veronica added, before noticing a white splodge on the end of Heather’s nose. She stifled a snicker. “Hey… Mara?”

“Hmm?” she hummed, her mouth busy chewing away at her dessert. Veronica sniggered as she pointed to her own nose, gesturing for her to clear off the whipped cream on her face. Heather just stared at her, confused.

“What?” Heather asked, deadpanning. “What is it?”

After a few moments of trying, Veronica just gave an amused sigh, before reaching out to wipe the cream off of her nose with her thumb. In seeing the cream on her hand, Heather gave a snort of laughter.

“ _Oh,_ ” she said, still grinning. Veronica felt obliged to chuckle along too, all the while staring at the blob of cream on her thumb.

“What do I do with this now?” she asked, giggling. Heather pouted, before she scooped it off her her thumb with her finger, then licked it up.

“There you go,” she said considerately. Veronica gave a huff.

“Thanks,” she said, before taking another bite of her waffle.

Then, for a while, they said nothing. They didn’t need to. Music was playing, dancing around the room coloured in blue, keeping the mood up as best as it could. They took a few swigs of their beers, ate more of their waffles, took some handfuls of popcorn, and for the first time that day, or even in the past few days, Veronica felt… alright.

Not great. But better.

Maybe it was the beer.

“Ooh, how about I make it so the lights change on their own?” Heather suddenly asked, picking up her remote again. Veronica chuckled.

“Sure, why not,” she said. “So long as it’s not flashy or anything. My poor tipsy brain can’t handle that.”

“Don’t worry, it’s set to be slow,” she uttered as she pressed some buttons. “I can actually set it to have certain colours. Got any preference?”

Veronica gave a thoughtful hum. “Maybe just some cool colours? Blue… green… purple... maybe magenta?”

“Sure! I can do that.” A bit more fiddling with the remote, and suddenly the blue hue of the room was fading into a deep sea green. Veronica’s smile picked up.

“This is really cool,” she mused, watching the colours shift ever so slowly.

“I know. I love the colour change setting, it’s my favourite.” Heather placed her empty plate on the nightstand, took another gulp of her beer before placing it beside the plate, then let herself flop onto her pillows, her body slumping down. She let out a sigh. “I… really needed this today,” she then murmured, her gaze elsewhere. The sudden softness in her tone caught her attention, and Veronica took another sip of her beer before placing it and the plate on the nightstand on her side.

“You alright?” she questioned, sinking into the pillowed next to her. Heather turned to her again, and she nodded.

“I’m fine, don’t worry.” She then pursed her lips. “Uh… thanks for coming over, though.” She gingerly smiled at her. “Especially since the weather wasn’t too great.”

Veronica gave a “tch,” before flipping onto her side. Heather did the same.

“Seems it’s cleared up _now,_ ” she pointed out, nodding over to the window. “God must _love_ me today,” she muttered.

“Was that sarcasm?” Heather asked. Veronica nodded.

“Uh-huh.”

“Oh.” She furrowed her brow. “Are you sure _you’re_ okay?” She shuffled a little closer. “You said you were feeling down-”

“It’s fine, Mara, really.” Veronica curled up a little, tucking her hand under her chin. “I mean, it hasn’t been the… _best_ day in the world-”

“Tell me!” she suddenly said, catching her off guard. “If you want,” she added with a softer tone. Veronica gave an apologetic smile.

“I… it’s fine. You have enough on your mind, anyway.”

Heather gazed solemnly at her. “Yeah, maybe.” She tucked her chin inwards a little. “But you helped me get it off my mind for awhile,” she then said, peering at her. “Good thing, too. It was starting to get… really out of control.” Those last few words came out as a whisper. Veronica stared at her.

“What do you mean?”

“I… again, it might sound-”

“Shh. No,” she cut her off, placing a finger on her lips. “Nothing tonight is ‘silly,’ okay?” She wrapped a hand around her wrist. “If you want to say something, just say it.”

Heather held her gaze for a moment, looking surprised by her words, before she nodded.

“Okay, well… whenever stuff like this happens, my head will just get…” her expression twisted, and she made an awkward gesture with her hand. “It’s like… like it goes down a spiral.” Her eyes dulled a little. “It’s like something can give me a push - even if it’s a small thing - and I’ll just end up falling down a spiral staircase.” She cringed when she looked back at Veronica. “...If that makes any sense.”

Veronica slowly nodded. “I think I get what you’re saying,” she replied. “Like, things can just… make you start thinking about a bunch of other things?”

Heather nodded, a little more vigorously than usual. “Yeah, like that.” She shuffled even closer. “It’s like a tiny crack in a damn, and suddenly… sploosh.” She made another gesture with her hands, portraying water bursting out of a damn. “It all comes out in one big violent river. Sure, I can _swim_ , but it’s difficult getting onto land again.” As soon as she finished speaking, she seemed to break out of whatever thought she was in. “That probably sounded odd.”

“No, it’s okay! I know what you mean.”

“You do?”

Veronica offered a reassuring smile. “Yeah, I do.”

It looked as if she was thankful. “Oh… should I go on, then?”

Veronica gave a nod. “If you need to. Or want to. I don’t mind.”

“Okay. Well, it’s even worse now since it wasn’t even a little push, it was a _big_ one.” She frowned. “I mean… losing that title is… a huge change. I just don’t know what to do.”

Veronica offered an empathetic smile, then caressed her arm to help her go on. It seemed to work, since the corner of those bright pink lips picked up a little.

“So everything’s just kind of... “ She sighed, then gave a shrug.

“Just a bit too much?” Veronica guessed. Heather nodded.

Veronica had to admit, she could feel those words for herself. Such a feeling used to be a daily thing some time ago, and could still come up in the present.

“Hey, sit up for a second,” she suddenly said, lifting herself from the mattress. She held Heather’s wrist and gave a light tug, and Heather followed her up, looking puzzled.

“What is it?”

Veronica bit her lip. “Does this happen a lot?”

Heather looked thoughtful for a moment, then shrugged. “I suppose. I mean, not a lot but it happens.”

“Well,” she began, taking hold of her hands. “I wanna try something out. Something that might help you calm down a little,” she said, running her thumbs across her knuckles. “Just in case it all gets too much.”

Heather deadpanned at her. “What is it?”

“Something I Iearned quite a while ago.” She simpered. “You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to, I just thought it might be useful.”

Heather didn’t respond for a second, but she eventually gave a hesitant nod. “Sure… okay.”

Veronica grinned. “So what we’re going to do is… breathe.”

“Breathe?” Heather echoed, looking confused.

“Breathe.”

“Okay?” she tilted her head slightly. Veronica chuckled.

“It’s just something to help you calm down a bit. Y’know, when things get a little out of control.”

“Oh.” Heather grunted, staring at the hands around her own. Then she looked back up. “Alright. How does this work?”

“It might be best if you close your eyes.”

Heather let her eyes flutter shut.

“Now, just breathe in as deep as you can, then I’ll tell you to breathe out. Sound good?”

Heather nodded. “Alright.”

Veronica smiled, then shut her eyes too. “In,” she told her, and she heard her inhale deeply. Veronica did the same. While doing so, she felt the hands she was holding tense a little, threatening to curl up into fists. “Out,” she then said, and Heather breathed out, as did she. Veronica could faintly feel her breath skim over her lips, despite her being a fair distance away. And while she exhaled, she could feel her hands unfold again, the muscles beneath her tan skin relaxing.

“In,” she said again, and the process repeated. This time Veronica allowed herself to indulge in the activity, letting any worries on her mind pile up so that she could release them again. “Out.” Heather Chandler, of course. That was what was on her mind. As she breathed out, she imagined all those thoughts spilling out of her lips, letting them go for just a while. Let her be alone with Mara for tonight.

She replayed the process a few more times, and Veronica noticed the fading harshness in Heather’s breath. On the final round, she was close to silent, and was merely a gentle breeze that brushed over her when she exhaled. Each time she did, her hands calmed even more, and she eventually felt her fingers interlock with her own.

Then they both blinked open their eyes, and Veronica saw a new glint in Heather’s; a calm rippling ocean. She couldn’t stop a smile crawling on her own lips at the sight.

“Do you feel any better?”

Heather smiled gingerly. “Yeah… I feel calmer now.” She felt the grip on her hands tighten a little. “Thanks for showing me that. It… cleared my mind up a little.”

“It’s fine,” she replied.

“And... uh… thanks for coming too.”

Veronica snickered. “Don’t worry about it.”

Heather then bit her lip, and her gaze dropped the their hands.

“It’s… it’s just that… I feel much better being around you,” she murmured, her fingers lightly tapping the back of Veronica’s hands, her touch akin to one of a feather. “Like, I just feel like I... “ She shook her head. “I don’t know.” She nervously peered at her. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m not very good at articulating my feelings.”

Veronica gave a sympathetic smile. “Hey, it’s alright,” she assured her, causing her to lift her head again. “If you need to tell me anything else, then do it however you want. Or however you need.” She grinned. “Or even show me, if you can’t put it into words. I’m all ears. Or eyes.”

Heather held her gaze for a moment, figure painted in a deep blue, her irises flickering back and forth. Then she took in a deep breath.

And then Veronica _froze_.

Heather McNamara had lunged forward, catching Veronica’s lips with her own. Her hands were still firmly wrapped around Veronica’s, holding her already stiff hands in place. A faint, yet intensely sweet flavour was seeping into her mouth, while light, warm breaths were beating against her face.

She could feel her pulse _racing_. Her face was _burning_. Her head _reeling._

It only lasted a few seconds, but if felt so much longer than that.

Veronica was still frozen in place when Heather jolted back, as if been shocked by loose electricity. Her eyes weren’t calm anymore - they were wide and filled with terror, and her lips were parted ever so slightly as she stared back at Veronica, dumbfounded.

“Fuck… fuck, Ronnie, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

Her shaking voice was what brought Veronica back into reality.

“Heather, it’s okay, just-” she tried to reach out for her hands that had abandoned her, but Heather was already dragging them through her hair, even catching her blonde bangs at one point and pulling them back too, revealing the other eye that was usually hidden beath.

“I don’t know what got into me! It’s just- you said-”

“Heather-”

“And I just-”

“Heather!”

Veronica finally caught her wrists, and Heather fell silent, staring back into her eyes with a panicked gaze.

“Heather, calm down - _breathe_ \- okay?”

Heather pursed her lips into a tight, quivering line, but she slowly nodded and slowly inhaled, this time more shakily.

Veronica opened her mouth to say something, but found herself pausing to try and process what had just happened.

Heather had just kissed her.

_Heather McNamara had just kissed her._

Veronica swallowed, before finally speaking.

“Listen… Heather… you don’t need to worry about it, okay? Let’s just-”

“But what about you and Heath-” Heather cut herself off before she could finish, slamming her hands over her mouth. Veronica stared at her.

“What?” she uttered. Heather winced.

“I- uh- wasn’t supposed to hint that I knew about that…” she whimpered behind her hands. Veronica’s eyes widened.

“You- _what_?” She edged forward a little bit, not breaking her gaze at any point. She could feel her heart begin to race. “ _What?_ ”

Slowly, Heather lowered her hands, revealing gritted teeth.

“I- nothing! Just pretend that none of this happened!”

“You _know_ about Heather and I?” she sputtered.

Heather dropped her gaze, waiting a while before nodding timidly. Veronica gaped at her.

“But what- where- _how long have you known_?”

“Since the night it happened!” she blurted out. Veronica blankly stared at her.

“Since _which_ night?”

Heather shot her an odd look. “Uh… _that_ night. Y’know…” Then her eyes rounded with realisation. “Wait, has there been _more_ than that night?”

Veronica cringed when she realised her mistake.

“Uh- no! Just that night!” Her words were followed by a nervous laugh, but it just wasn’t enough to erase the look of shock on Heather’s face.

“I _knew_ it!” she barked. “I knew there was something going on between you two!”

“W-wait, Heather, _slow down for a sec_ ,” Veronica pleaded, placing her hands on her shoulders. “Just… too much is happening right now.”

“Sorry, I’m just…” Heather shook her head, then straightened herself up.

“Okay… first of all, _how do you know about this_?” she questioned, perhaps a little harsher than she meant to. “Heather and I have kept it under wraps for-”

“Technically, you told me,” Heather replied, cutting in. Veronica gave her a look of perplexion.

“What? When?” Her expression twisted in disbelief. “I never-”

“You were drunk. You won’t remember.” She scraped her teeth over her lip. “Heather doesn’t, anyway.”

Veronica stared at her blankly. “Drunk? When was this?”

“When you all came to my house that night!” she explained. “You and Heather got so drunk you couldn’t even get up the stairs without my help.” A weak huff of amusement escaped her lips, but it was soon buried by her guilty expression. “So… that’s what I did. I helped you both up the stairs and when I got to you, I… uh…”

Veronica’s brows knitted as she went on. “I don’t remember this!”

“I know,” Heather replied dryly. “But… when I helped you to your room I noticed that you had…” She gestured to her neck, and Veronica immediately caught on what she was referring to, and she felt her face heat up. “I asked you about it and you said that Heather did it… but you went to bed before I could say anything else.”

Veronica just stared at her in bewilderment. How had she not known about this? Why didn’t anyone _tell_ her about this?

“Why didn’t you say anything? After all this time?”

Heather visibly stiffened. “I did. A week later.”

Veronica could only listen to Heather explain how she’d told Chandler about that night’s events at a party that she hadn’t gone to, and how Chandler had told her to stay silent. Perhaps she would’ve gotten mad at her, but she also just… couldn’t blame her. Even Veronica was terrified of what could happen if anyone found out about their hookups.

As it turns out, someone had all along. Sort of.

“...And I’ve done my best to stay silent about it… but it’s been _killing_ me!” She scraped her nails over her scalp. “I don’t know what the hell is going on between you two!”

 _Me neither,_ she was very close to saying, though she held back.

“I mean… I probably shouldn’t tell you, but…” She chewed on her lip as thoughts about everything that had happened buzzed around her head. “If you think it’s been killing _you_ , imagine what it’s like for me.”

Heather shot her a pitiful look. “Has it been eating you up too?”

“More like _devouring_ ,” she groaned. “All I’ve had to vent my frustrations in is my diary.”

Heather frowned. “I won’t tell anyone.”

Veronica gave her a thankful look, before taking a deep breath.

“...Heather and I are…” She shifted uncomfortably as she tried to find the words. “...Friends with benefits,” she muttered sourly.

She was met with a loud gasp of relief from Heather. Veronica gave her an odd look.

“You seem strangely relieved by that.”

“Sorry, I thought you were going to say that you were _dating_ ,” she said. “And that I just made you cheat on her by kissing me.”

Veronica couldn’t hold back a snort. “Heather, you _do_ realise she’s on a date _as we speak_ , don’t you?”

Heather raised her brows. “Oh yeah, I forgot about-!” She stopped to grimace. “...Wait, Ronnie?”

“Hmm?”

“Is… is that’s what gotten you down?” She tilted her head at her. “Her going on a date?”

Veronica stared at her for a moment, trying to think up an answer.

“I… I guess so.” She hung her head, staring at her hands. “I shouldn’t be though,” she grumbled. “Like I said, whatever’s going on between us is casual and nothing more.”

“Wait, so, um…” Heather’s voice made Veronica lift her head again. “When you say _casual_ , do you mean… a casual make out session? Or is it…”

“No,” she grunted. “No, we’ve gone further than that.”

Heather’s eyes grew wide in shock. “You… you two _fu_ -”

Veronica placed her fingers over her mouth. “Yes, Mara, we fucked. We’re fuck buddies.”

It looked as if Heather had just discovered the meaning of the human race’s existence.

“But you’re a- no, _were_ a _virgin_!” she exclaimed. Veronica felt her cheeks heat up a little. So the Heathers didn’t forget about that (outdated) fact afterall.

“And?”

Heather gripped onto the sleeve of her green shirt. “Heather _never_ goes for virgins! She’s too good for people with zero experience!” The corner of her mouth quirked up for a moment. “In her words.”

Veronica felt a _little_ bit of warmth in her chest when she said that, but it quickly faded.

“Yeah, well, she never goes for girls either, I’d imagine.” She shrugged. “I feel like we’re allowed to break the rules here, Mara.”

“Veronica, do you realise how _insane_ this all is?”

“Yes.”

Heather looked unconvinced. “You don’t sound like you do.”

Veronica gave an exasperated sigh. “Because this has been going on for almost a month. I’ve tired myself out with writing _‘holy shit! I lost my virginity to Heather Chandler!’_ in my diary.”

“That’s… fair.” Then her face scrunched up. “Hey, _wait a minute_ , did you two have sex on my _couch_?”

Veronica widened her eyes. “What? No!” It took her a moment to actually realise why she would’ve thought that. “We didn’t have sex that night!”

“Oh.” She let out a sigh of relief. “Good, I’ve been sitting there for the past three weeks.” Then she eyed Veronica curiously. “Wait, so when _did_ you two…” She hit her hands together in an awkward gesture. Veronica understood that it was supposed to mean ‘fuck.’

“Uh… remember after we left the Remington party together?” she said, her voice growing slightly quiet. Heather mouthed an ‘oh,’ realising what she meant. Then she glared at her.

“Now _hold up_ ,” she griped. “You’re telling me that while _I_ was getting my _nose_ broken, _you_ were busy losing your virginity to Heather Chandler?” She gave a frustrated pout. “How is _that_ fair?”

Veronica frowned. “No need to make me feel guilty about it…” she muttered. “Besides, leaving afterwards didn’t start out the most fun.”

“What do you mean?”

She thought back to that night, memories of Heather’s tears rolling down her face as she let out loud sobs on her shoulder filling her head, and she shook her head.

“It’s personal,” is all she said. “But yeah, guess that _is_ a little unfair, huh?” She gave a weak amused huff, and Heather did the same.

Then they fell silent.

“So… uh…” Heather spoke up, catching Veronica’s attention. “This is what’s being getting you down, huh?”

Veronica’s lids drooped a little as she nodded.

“It’s stupid,” she muttered. “It really shouldn’t. It’s not like we’re _dating_ or anything…” She scuffled back towards the pile of pillows, allowing herself to flop onto them like a lifeless doll, staring up at the ceiling that was currently coloured in purple. “So she should be able to do whatever the hell she wants.” She folded her arms over her chest. She hardly noticed Mara crawl over to her side and gaze down at her. “I guess it just stings a little.”

“Why’s that?”

Veronica glanced up at her. “I don’t know. Maybe I’m a self-entitled bitch and I want to feel special at all times.” She gave a sad huff. “And her going off to bang other people doesn’t really give me that feeling.”

“You’re the least self-entitled person I know, Ronnie,” Heather said, giving a light chuckle. Veronica gave a snicker.

“That’s not saying much. The other two people you know are Heather and Heather, and… well…”

“That’s not very nice!” A pause. “But also very true!”

Veronica snorted at that.

“But are you feeling down because… you’re jealous?”

Hearing the word out loud made Veronica hot with shame, but she couldn’t bring herself to deny it.

“Yeah, I guess.”

“So… do you _like_ her?”

Veronica gritted her teeth. “Kinda. Maybe. A little. I suppose.”

“What about her?” she asked. “Does she like you?”

Veronica scoffed. “If I knew that, perhaps I wouldn’t be lying on your bed venting to you about all of this.” She frowned deeply. “I wish I knew, though. What she feels, I mean.”

“Have you asked?”

Veronica could’ve laughed at such a suggestion. “This is Heather Chandler we’re talking about, Heather.” She arched a brow at her. “You really think she’s going to tell me shit about how she _feels_?”

Heather winced. “I guess you’re right.”

“Besides. As if she could develop feelings for me anyway.” She rolled her eyes. “When was the last time she _didn’t_ get with someone just for a fuck?” She scowled. “Heather Duke said it herself: ‘date’ doesn’t exist in her language. It’s just a synonym for hookup.”

She felt a hand rest on her shoulder, and she gazed up at Heather solemnly, whose expression seemed so dark in the blue light. Despite that, she could still see the sympathetic glint in her eye.

“I’ll be honest, you’re right.” Ouch. “I don’t remember the last time she had an actual relationship that didn’t end with her breaking things off after a week because she got bored.” Oddly specific. “But I also don’t think you’re ‘just a fuck.’”

“What makes you say that?” she grunted.

“I mean… like I said, she doesn’t go for virgins. Or girls. Or nerds.”

“You calling me a nerd?”

“Yes.” She grinned. “You’re a huge nerd.”

“Thanks, that means a lot,” she huffed, before her smile drooped. “But… even if all that’s true… she’s clearly fine with going off with whoever.” She shrugged. “If I really am _special_ in her book, she’s shit at showing it.”

She gazed up at Heather, who was now glowing a magenta colour, and saw a pitiful look in her speckly, hazel irises.

Then suddenly, Veronica felt herself lifted off the mattress as if she was weightless and pulled into a tight, warm hug. It was a surprise, but by no means an unpleasant one. While McNamara was the softer soul of the group, her hold was firm and strong. Veronica felt a smile crawl on her lips, and she let her head rest on her shoulder, her blonde locks tickling her cheek. But that was fine. Her curls were soft and had a vague sweet smell, one that reminded her of honey and almond.

“You looked like you needed a hug,” Heather explained, her voice growing soft. “So…”

Veronica chuckled, then leaned back a little, Heather’s arms still wrapped around her torso protectively.

“Thanks, Mara,” she murmured. In the magenta light, Veronica couldn’t see clearly enough to confirm, but she could’ve sworn she saw her cheeks grow darker.

And it was that which suddenly hit her like a tonne of bricks.

She and Heather had just _kissed_.

Veronica’s first instinct was to slip out of Heather’s hold, to move away from her and begin asking questions to _why she did that_.

But she didn’t want to do that. Maybe it was because her hold on her was firm, unwilling to let her go so easily. Maybe it was because Heather was easy to talk to, even if she wasn’t always the best with words. Maybe it was because Veronica was less than okay, but Heather had made her more than okay.

Maybe it was because she wanted to let go of her worries, if not for a night.

Or maybe it was the alcohol.

All Veronica knew is that she was cupping Heather’s chin, holding it in place, while she leaned forward. She heard Heather sharply gasp, but she cut it off with a soft, gentle and somewhat nervous kiss.

The shock was over in seconds, and Heather’s hands shot to Veronica’s hair. Her fingers tangling in it. Veronica wrapped her arms around her waist. She felt Heather tilt her head a little, allowing herself to deepen the kiss. Veronica obliged, tugging her closer to feel her warmth. She heard Heather lightly hummed as she did, the sound making Veronica smile against her criminally soft lips.

Then they parted to take a gulp of air.

Veronica grinned at her half-lidded hazel gaze, bringing one hand up to brush her bangs away from her face.

She pulled back a little more to just _look_ at Heather. She was now coloured in green, the light drawing a glow around her curly, slightly messy blonde locks, her small curvy figure and the frame of her face.

She swallowed. She could recognize this feeling all too well. Her brain was telling her to _get out_ before it was too late.

 _Not my fault Heather is as strong as all hell,_ she argued with herself, feeling Heather pull her back in. Their lips collided again, this time a little rougher. That may have been Veronica’s fault for grabbing Heather’s bottom lip between her teeth, sucking on it lightly. She felt her chest tighten when she heard her let out a whine.

Then Veronica felt her breath get knocked out of her as Heather pushed forward, pinning her on the bed with her hidden strength. Veronica let out a gasp when she felt her straddle her waist, all the while holding her down by the wrists. She was stunned when Mara dared to slip her tongue into her mouth when her lips parted. She let out a quiet groan when their tongues intertwined. She tasted something overwhelmingly sweet - probably all that syrup she’d put on her waffles.

Then Heather parted with an audible _pop,_ released her wrists and stared down at her in bewilderment.

“I-I…” she stammered, her breaths heavy. “I shouldn’t have-”

Veronica just smirked and grabbed her yellow sweater by the collar, pulling her back down to let their lips meet again.

Veronica felt Mara cup her cheeks as they lost themselves in the kiss again, Veronica wrapping her arms around her neck to pull her closer.

Then Mara parted again and mumbled against Veronica’s lips, “What about Heather?”

That made Veronica pause, and actually _think_.

What the _hell_ was she doing?

“I…” She furrowed her brow. “I imagine she probably has a dick in her mouth right now.” She shrugged, staring up at Heather with a darkened gaze. “If she can do that, I can do _this_.”

She tried to tug Heather back down again, but she still looked unconvinced, and remained apart.

“A-are you sure?” She bit her lip. “I… I don’t want to get in the way of-”

“You’re not getting in the way of _anything_ ,” she assured her, leaning up a little to feel her hot breaths skim over her lips. “Because there’s _nothing_.”

Veronica then thought back to the previous week. She thought about Heather Chandler. She thought about how she gazed at her with dilated pupils, how she pressed up against her when under the covers, how she said and _moaned_ her name.

Was all of that _nothing_?

She frowned.

“And if there _was_ anything,” she added, wrapping an arm around the small of Heather’s back. “She wouldn’t have ran off with some other hookup. Because that’s all I am.” She hovered so close that her lips would graze over Heather’s. “I’m one of her hookups.”

She heard Heather swallow.

“What about us?”

Veronica had to stop for a moment.

She didn’t know. She didn’t know what she was doing.

She also didn’t know what _Heather_ was doing.

“I… don’t even know what we’re doing.”

Heather arched a brow. “Making out.”

“Yeah, I know, but _why_?”

Heather paused for a second, her fingers tapping the pillow on next to both of her ears.

“Because you said to _show_ me how I feel,” she leaned a little closer. “So I did.”

“And what does that- _ah_ …” She was cut off by Heather nipping her ear. Her hand shot up to grip her hair. “What does that entail?”

“Don’t know,” she murmured against her ear. “But I _do_ know that out of all the guys I’ve kissed over the years…” She pressed her lips on her jawline. “You’re better than all of them.”

Hearing that made a thought suddenly occur to her.

“I had no idea you were a lesbian, Mara,” she chuckled breathily as the blonde began to trail kisses down her jawline. “How long have you known?”

Heather paused.

“How long has it been since we first kissed?”

“Um… about ten minutes?”

“About ten minutes.”

Veronica giggled.

“You won’t tell anyone, will you?” Heather then asked, sounding a little more concerned.

Veronica widened her eyes at the suggestion, before cupping her face with her hand and smiling.

“Of course not.”

“Good,” Heather said, bringing her hand up to rest it over Veronica’s, then leaning in again for another peck on her lips. “Um… what does this make us, though?”

Veronica stared back up at her, thinking about the question.

What were she and Mara doing?

With everything going on around them, everything with Heather, mainly… she felt that would bring nothing but _disaster_ . Hell, if Chandler found out about this, and this _alone_ , how would she react?

 _I have no idea,_ she thought frowning. _Though, if she expects me to be okay with_ her _date, shouldn’t I get the same treatment?_ She sighed. _Then again, this is Chandler we’re talking about. As if she’s going to consider what she_ should _do._

“This can just be a casual thing,” she said, her voice low. “We can just blow off steam whenever.” She wrapped her arms around her neck and smirked. “And I have _a lot_ of steam to blow off right now.”

She held back a cackle when the colour in Mara’s face darkened.

“Yeah… I can do that,” she replied, before letting her lips trail down to Veronica’s neck. Veronica fluttered her eyes shut as Heather began to pepper gentle kisses that felt as soft as a feather brushing over her skin, then caught her breath in her throat when she felt her bite down hard. As in, _really_ hard.

“J- _Jesus_ , Mara!” she gasped, tugging on her blonde hair. Heather immediately let go and shot her a look of concern.

“Did that hurt?”

Veronica let out a few heavy breaths before speaking. “Yes,” she replied, before pulling her back in. “Now do it again.”

She grinned when Heather obeyed, coating her with reds and purples with her teeth, leaving a wake of sharp pain each time. She ran her fingers down her back, up until she found the hem of her sweater, where she let her hands slip underneath and allowed her nails to dig into her skin each time she felt teeth clamp down on her.

Through her pants and whimpers, Veronica blinked open an eye, gazing over to the nightstand. Her vision was slightly fuzzy and currently coloured in with a magenta colour, but she could still see the shape of her half-empty beer bottle.

And suddenly she was reminded of something.

“H-Heather, wait a sec-” she breathed, pushing on her shoulder. Heather looked up at her.

“Huh?”

“How drunk are you?”

Heather glanced at her own bottle, then back at her.

“Not all that much. I’m a little bit tipsy, but only as tipsy as you can be with beer that’s four percent.” She let out a light huff. “What about you? You’ve had more than me, haven’t you?”

“Yeah, like half a bottle,” she said shrugging. “I’m tipsy, but that’s about it.”

“Oh.” She then pursed her lips. “Why’d you ask, anyway?”

Veronica didn’t use her words. Instead, she gave a wicked smirk as she found the clasp of Heather’s bra and swiftly unhooked it, and Heather’s eyes widened in response, her cheeks growing darker than Veronica had ever seen.

“So _now_ you’re shy?” Veronica teased after a few moments of silence, sitting up so that their noses would brush. “Weren’t _you_ the one who kissed _me_ ?” She raised a brow, grinning. She heard Heather swallow. Veronica chuckled lowly. “If you don’t want to use your words, then just _show_ me how you feel.” Her smirk widened.

Heather did nothing during the second that the magenta light turned blue. Then she was back on Veronica’s neck, hands locked around the small of her back, all the while Veronica explored the territory under her sweater. She heard Heather whine against her ear, making Veronica’s heart race.

Her hands ran over Heather’s abdomen, expecting to be met with soft skin, but that’s not what she found.

“Holy _shit_ ,” she breathed. “You have _abs_ , Mara?”

She heard her giggle, then she pulled back.

“Yeah. Why?” She gave a cheeky grin, before grabbing the ends of her sweater. “Interested?”

Veronica bit her lip as she watched her slip the clothing off, and suddenly she was reminded that she’d already thrown her bra away. Woops(?)

She caught her breath as she stared at those muscles rippling beneath her shimmering skin which was currently coloured in a yellow glow, her figure shimmering under the light. Veronica let herself give into all urges manifesting in her head and wrapped her arms around her torso, trailing her lips down her neck, over her shoulder, across her collarbone…

Using all the strength she could muster, Veronica twisted her around so that she’d hit the mattress, with Veronica now being the one straddling her waist. She gazed down at the blonde beneath her and smirked at the sheepish grin on her bright pink lips, before quickly slipping her own top off.

Before Heather could comment, Veronica’s pressed her lips back on hers, slipping her tongue past them. Mara let out a whine into her mouth, making Veronica grin into the kiss. She felt short nails dig into her spine, before those fingers began to fiddle with her bra. Their kiss grew rougher, and Veronica hardly noticed herself roll her hips against Heather’s. Heather was quick to mimic her, having to break away from her lips to let out gasps of pleasure.

Perhaps they could both forget about their problems, if not for a little while.

 

* * *

 

Veronica was awake, but her eyes weren’t open. They felt too heavy to lift.

She could feel that she was warm. Very warm. She was lying on a mattress much softer than her own, under a thick, smooth duvet. Her body was tangled up with something impossibly warm, curly hair twirling around her jawline.

Odd.

She forced herself to blink open an eye, and she was met with a dimly lit room. Heather’s room. Heather McNamara’s room, to be more specific.

_Oh._

The realisation was enough to wake her up completely, and her eyes flashed open. She looked down and bit back a loud gasp in seeing herself wrapped up with McNamara, who also just happened to be wearing _nothing_.

Memories of last night came flooding back to her, and she could do nothing but lie still for a moment.

Oh God. She’d fucked Heather McNamara.

She could’ve very well asked herself why she’d done that, but in resting her chin on those golden locks and feeling her arms wrapped around her in a firm embrace, she already knew the answer with how her chest fluttered with each light breath that skimmed over her collarbone.

Her logical part of her brain was telling her to get up, wake Heather up and have a _nice long talk_ about what happened last night, but she didn’t pay it any heed. Instead, she curled up into her embrace and let her eyes close again, wanting to stay put for as long as she could. She knew that as soon as she woke up, she’d have to eventually walk back out into the real world and have to deal with whatever was awaiting for her, and she knew Mara thought the same.

She felt herself fall back asleep to dream about nothing she could remember, then was woken up again by the body next to her shifting. She fluttered her lashes open and saw Heather, neck and shoulders covered in bite marks that looked like they stung, now sitting up, clasping on her bra.

“Morning,” she grunted, hauling herself off the impossibly soft mattress. Heather whipped her head over to her, as if surprised that she was awake.

“Oh! Morning, Ronnie…” she replied, her voice sounding skittish. Veronica gave a half smile, shifting over to her.

“You feeling alright?” she asked, tiredly leaning on her shoulder. For a moment, she didn’t respond.

“Uh… yeah. Yeah, I’m alright.”

Veronica peered at her curiously. “You sure?”

Mara bit her lip.

“It’s just… this is really new to me,” she murmured, the uncertainty in her voice making Veronica pick her head off of her shoulder. “I’ve never…” She glanced at Veronica and gestured to them both. Veronica nodded in understanding.

“It’s okay,” she assured her, taking hold of her hand. She still couldn’t catch her eye properly though, and she eventually figured out it was because she was trying to avert her gaze from her bare chest. She pulled the duvet up to cover it up, which seemed to help a little. “You don’t need to worry about it, alright?”

Heather finally locked eyes with her.

“B-but you were _amazing_!” she blurted out. Veronica was about to thank her, but she continued on before she could get the chance. “I’ve… I’ve never slept with anyone as good as you!” She bit her lip and tightened her hold on Veronica’s hand. “I… I was joking last night about me being a lesbian, but…” She sighed defeatedly. “I don’t think I… I’ve never been into a guy like this.”

Veronica slowly nodded.

“I’ve always wondered why Heather was so into dick,” she mumbled. “Now I know I should’ve been wondering why _I_ wasn’t into it.” She then gave a puzzled look. “Wait… if you and her have…” she tilted her head a little, vaguely making a gesture that meant “fuck” before going on, “then… _does_ she like guys?”

Veronica gave a weak chuckle, ignoring the fact that all this talk about Heather was reminding her that while she just woke up in McNamara’s bed, Chandler probably woke up in some other guy’s bed.

“I think so,” she said. “It’s possible, anyway. I still like guys.”

Heather raised her brows. “You do? But… but you just-”

“It’s possible to like both, y’know,” she giggled, elbowing her lightly. Heather mouthed an “oh.”

“I.. never knew that.”

“I know. Crazy stuff.” She snickered. “But I’m assuming that’s not you?”

Heather hesitated, before shaking her head. “Either you were just _ungodly_ good at sex, or I just like girls _way_ better than guys.” She looked a little dazed. “Maybe that’s why my nails have never grown all that long. It was a _sign_.”

Veronica burst out laughing.

“Maybe!” she said, still sniggering. Heather’s lips were also threatening to curl into a smile as well. “Or maybe I really _am_ ungodly good at sex.”

Heather gave a giggle. “Maybe both?”

Veronica’s expression lit up at that. “So is that a yes?”

“Depends,” Mara huffed, resting her cheek in her palm and gazing over at her with a brash grin. Veronica pouted at her.

“Depends on what?”

“Depends who was better.”

Veronica let out an indignant squeak. “Okay, _cocky_.”

“Are you sure? I didn’t see a _single_ cock the entire time.”

Veronica laughed again, snorting as she did so. She looked back up at Mara, who had a wide grin plastered on her face.

“You seem happier,” she then stated, still letting out huffs of laughter. Heather let out a hum.

“I guess so, yeah.” She shrugged, looking at her hands. “Thanks for coming for me, Ronnie,” she said, her voice growing more serious. Veronica smiled at her.

“You’ve already thanked me.” She pursed her lips. “And maybe I should thank you too.”

Heather gave her a curious look. “For what?”

“I’ve been holding in the whole… _thing_ with Heather for weeks,” she admitted. “It just felt good having someone to talk to about it.”

“It wasn’t the only thing that felt good.” Mara winked. Veronica felt her face heat up.

“You’re not wrong,” she chuckled, leaning forward a little. Heather’s mouth twitched when she did so. “Say, if you ever need to blow off steam like this again, you can always ask me,” she told her, her volume lowering as she lingered closer to her lips.

“So we’re still friends, then?” Mara asked. Veronica looked at her in surprise.

“Of course we are!” she giggled. “I’m just saying, if you want the ‘benefits’ suffix, I don’t mind.” She moved away a little. “But if you want this to be a one time thing, that’s okay too.”

Heather shook her head vigorously, before lunging forward to close the gap between them. Veronica raised her hands to cup her cheeks, while Heather let her hands run down her neck, over her shoulder and stopping at her chest to lure moans out of her. Veronica had to part from the kiss when those hands tightened their grip.

“ _Tease_ ,” she grunted.

“It’s called _revenge_ ,” she retorted. “ _You_ can’t complain about teasing after last night.”

Veronica snickered at those… inappropriate memories.

“Hah… touche,” she breathed as Heather leaned forward to run a tongue up her neck.

“Do you mean it, by the way?” Heather whispered in her ear. “You’re okay with blowing off steam whenever?”

She nipped at her earlobe, and Veronica brought up a hand to run it through her hair, weaving through the brown-tinted roots. “Yeah, I do.” She looked ahead as Heather nibbled at her neck, a little more solemnly. Suddenly she remembered that she would have to face Chandler again in just a couple of days.

And she may or may not have just made the whole situation two hundred times more awkward than it already had been.

“Um… mind if we blow off a bit of steam _now_?” she murmured, wanting to forget about those annoying thoughts in her head. She heard Heather giggle next to her ear.

“Isn’t that what we’re _doing_?”

Veronica let out a snicker as she continued to pepper kisses along the length of her neck.

“Guess you’re right.”

 

* * *

 

Veronica stared at her three friends, her eyes darting to JD, to Martha and then to Betty. All of them looked concerned, with a hint of curiosity in the mix.

She couldn’t tell them what had happened. Not in detail. But maybe she could vent a little. Just the one thing that was on her mind. Just to get it off of her chest.

“To put it as _simply_ as I possibly can,” she began, swallowing down her nervousness. “Let’s just say, the next time you mention that I have a crush on ‘Heather,’” she bit her lip, “you should make it a plural.”

 

* * *

 

Heather couldn’t sleep.

She had been trying to _force_ her eyes shut for the past few goddamn hours, but she just _wouldn’t sleep_.

This wasn’t her room. She was used to that. She was used to waking up in someone else’s bed. Hadn’t even been that long since she’d done so - less than a week.

Only now, she was in someone else’s bed - a _guy’s_ bed, to be more specific - close to toppling over onto the rough carpet below.

The bed was small. Not as small as Veronica’s, but small nonetheless.

She hated small beds. Less room for her. She deserved better than to be pushed near the edge of the mattress. If she could scoot to the middle - the _best_ part of the bed - she would.

Though, when she sat up and looked at the vague silhouette of her ‘date,’ she was reminded that she technically could. But she wouldn’t. Heather Chandler never cuddled against anyone. She was too good for that. No matter how attractive they were, no matter how rich, no matter how good at sex they were, _cuddling_ was out of the question.

She wondered if Veronica knew that.

Speaking of who, _fuck_ Veronica for being on her mind tonight. _Fuck_ her stupid laugh replaying in her head whenever she attempted to crack a joke, only to bite it back, because dates weren’t for _cracking jokes_ , she had to remind herself, they were simply a tool to use to get to the endgame. That endgame being a _fuck_.

So _fuck_ her brain for thinking of Veronica during that, too. She didn’t even know why that had happened - the guy she’d picked out for tonight was pretty good looking, and he wasn’t _too_ bad at sex either. Why the hell did she feel the need to think about _Veronica_?

She felt the need to hug herself when the cold night air hit her bare skin. The bed was cold. It may have had two people in it, but it was fucking freezing. She was freezing.

She let out a long, drawn out sigh as she let her head drop onto her tucked up knees.

She didn’t want to be here. She didn’t want to be cold. She didn’t want to be- no, _feel_ alone.

Not after what she’d had with Veronica. She knew for a damn fact that if she was in the bed with her now instead of her _date_ , she’d wake up and wrap her arms around her, pull her closer and run her hand up and down her back, maybe through her hair too, waiting up until she fell asleep on her shoulder.

She, as silently as she could, slipped out of bed, cringing at how cold his room was, and went for a hunt for her clothes in the dark. First thing she found was her bra, thank God.

As she clasped it, she wondered if Veronica would maybe kiss her on the ear, too.

She grabbed some more of her clothes - soon enough the only thing missing was her t-shirt.

Who knows, maybe Veronica would even kiss her on the lips, constantly asking her if she was okay, even though she’d never found the courage to actually answer truthfully.

Finally, she was fully dressed. No point in rummaging through her bag to find her hairbrush - it was dark out and her car was just outside. No one would notice.

Maybe listening to Veronica talk to her would’ve helped her fall asleep, she thought as she made it to her car door. Maybe she wouldn’t even be awake right now.

But she _was_ awake, and she was currently making the twenty minute drive back to her house at who-the-fuck-knows o’clock in the morning.

She shouldn’t even be upset. This was her routine. Get a date. Get a fuck. Win-win. This was normal.

Or it _had_ been, up until _Veronica_ interfered and fucked everything over on its head.

She wondered if Veronica knew that.

Now all she wanted was to stop this damn car outside _her_ house, call her name until she opened up and drag her into her bedroom. And she could’ve done that. Her house was on the way home - she could easily stop there and do exactly that. If she was lucky, maybe her parents weren’t even home, and she wouldn’t have to be _quiet_ this time.

And she almost did. She very nearly made a turn down her street instead of straight ahead. She very nearly went to her house.

But she told herself _no_ and that’s _final_ . She had to keep telling herself _no_ up until she’d parked her car in her driveway, got inside her house and was finally back in her room.

And when she was finally sitting down on her bed, her body fatigued but head wide awake, she could finally tell herself that she had said _no_ because she was in too deep. Way too deep. Don’t go deeper. You’re in too deep already.

She wrapped her arms around herself, akin to how Veronica would hold her. How Veronica would treat her. She couldn’t hold back a scoff at herself.

_If I’m in too deep…_

She tightened her hold on herself.

_Why do I feel like I can breathe?_

She sat there for a while, unmoving from the edge of her bed. Her head was racing, trying to think of what to do.

Does she try again? Does she just find another date, wait until all of this just _goes away_?

That though caused a shiver to go up her spine.

She didn’t want this to go away. She fucking hated this feeling, she fucking hated Veronica for never leaving her thoughts, and she fucking hated her stupid urges to drag her back into her room and do it all over again.

But she loved it too much to let it go.

_I wonder if Veronica knows that?_

**Author's Note:**

> i'm getting a hunch that she doesn't know that, Chandler
> 
> anyway, this AU has a blog, in case you weren't aware! shoot an ask if ya wanna,,
> 
> https://heathersgameoftag.tumblr.com/


End file.
